So today while i was walking & listening to my music i got called the n word by someone passing with their car, at first i heard him but I ignored since he was behind me but then when he passed in front of me he repeated it while laughing & looking at me, I can’t stop thinking about it, im already a very depressed person suffering with OCD and traumas, people don’t realize how bad their words can affect someone, it ruined my whole day, im now even more depressed… how do i get over it? Im so stressed & anxious i was literally shaking I couldn’t believe what just happened.
Im so sick of this shit, like at this point im thinking about lightening my skin I can’t take this anymore.

23 comments

  1. I’m sorry this happened to you. The only thing you can do in this situation is to point your phone at them and start recording. If they know they may end up on the internet acting a racist fool in front of millions, they will stfu

  2. I’m so sorry. That’s fucked up. They were just racist assholes. You did nothing wrong. You are not wrong.

  3. Theyr a coward and a loser, saying it from their car like a little bitch. Whatever that person was thinking was a reflection of them and not of you. Them judging you and doing that means there’s something wrong with them and it has nothing to do with you.

  4. If that can make you feel a bit better, people will find any tangible reason to single you out just to project their insecurities on you.

    Today people will call you a Nugget, tomorrow a Noodle, or who knows, maybe something even more ostracizing.

    Yes there are assholes, but the good news is you aren’t becoming one of them, right ?

  6. I’m so sorry this happened to you. People can truly be asshats. Like damn, can’t we just accept each other without having to judge their skin colour?

  7. They know exactly how much their words affect others. That’s how they “win” and feel better about their shitty life. How you win is not letting them affect you.

    Breathe in, breathe out, remember that their actions and words reflect who THEY are, not who you are. Go do something you enjoy, preferably somewhat active or at least something that requires concentration. Compliment someone and watch them light up. Learn something new. Spend time with any young children in your life. Read r/mademesmile and r/upliftingnews.

    Do NOT give assholes space in your brain rent free. This world is massive, there are BILLIONS of people, all dealing with own internal demons. Many of them never learned the skills to process their shit in a healthy way. That isn’t your fault, but it becomes your problem if you let it. Don’t let it.

  9. Do not worry, my friend. Once my planetary takeover is complete, their life is forfeit.

    To some people hate is as natural as breathing. They exhaled their waste on to you in the form of this attack. They’re angry their life isn’t going as they planned, they fear they aren’t worthy of love, and one day they’ll be sad because they are alone, having exhaled the same toxins around them, leaving only those who are immune (that is, other toxic individuals) to keep them company.

    As they exhale hate, you can exhale kindness and acceptance. You’ll never be short on people to depend on.

  11. You can find solace in knowing that they know nothing about you, they would have said it to anyone, and probably do, without a care at all. Don’t let shit people affect you, you control your well-being ♡

  14. Don’t let a piece of shit ruin your day. Live your best life and keep moving forward.

    Wishing you the best future. ❤️

  16. Hateful. I’m so sorry. Please don’t let it get to you! This is simply a trash human being and it reflects on the rot in THEIR soul.

  18. just know that only people who are hurting themselves say stuff like that to other people. their life probably sucks so they just wanted you to feel just as bad

  20. please please PLEASEEEE do NOT lighten your skin. its not worth it. your skin tone is beautiful as it is. dont let some racist fucking loser ruin your confidence. your skin represents that you and people of your complexion are deeply loved. black is beautiful, always remember that 🤍

  21. I’d like to add a Black perspective.

    Between the ages of 13-18, I encountered quite a bit of racism from peers (i.e. ‘ur not that Black’), institutions (like the boarding school I attended), and authority figures (people convincing me as a child that I needed to be watched more carefully). I was only ever called the N word by strangers who sought to disempower me.

    At 13 & 14, I would happily investigate other reasons that a person doesn’t like me. I would assume it’s the way I dress, how smart I am *hair flip*, practically anything other than my skin because I can’t change or alter that. I wanted to block the words from hurting me but I was defenseless.

    At 16, I lost my scholarship to attend boarding school and was kicked out because I’d gotten into trouble with partying/doing drugs at school with a few other students. I was devastated from having to leave, But Also angry and surprised that those wealthier students (who were almost Exclusively white and East Asian) who got in trouble got to stay. It was at the ripe age of 16 that I realized maybe racism is multi-layered; one layer is what people will hate you/ which institutions will turn you away for your skin, and the other, more insidious level of how fearful, anxious, paranoid, and depressed living in a racist society or community makes you. Even though I Knew my friends weren’t snitches, I began to turn on them, accusing them of ratting me out to save themselves.

    👉🏿 Some people may comment on this post that these issues ‘sound like primarily class issues’, and to avoid dwelling on this point, Yes, there is a class component, but controlling for S.E.S., the hood is a rougher place to live than the trailer park and the data speaks volumes. Just Google ‘Black COVID death rate’ for more context👈🏿

    From 16 onwards, I was more aggressive in pursuit of my academic and career goals because I knew, for no reason other my skin color, people would challenge and judge and scrutinize me more than my white peers, so I Had to be a bit better than them at everything I did. I figured I would be the system that accounts for the racist gap. I didn’t bridge the gap, though I did gain some recognition.

    At 18, I attended a Top university wherein I was promised that the university is tough on racism. A lie. At 18, I had come to terms with the fact that I can’t bridge the gap without ending institutional racism itself, but I could attack the gap aggressively. The strategy works on any institution whose reputation is worth money. This is the offensive version of ‘pull out ur phone & record’.

    All this is to say, you will go through your own journey with race I’m sure, but I think recognizing the multiple layers, and practicing fighting the battle against racism internally and externally are important in beating interactions like this one. I also think you should expect this journey to take some time, since for Black folks, beating racism is Crucial for life, for liberty, and the for pursuit of happiness 🌻

  22. That person likely comes from and lives in a bubble of monotonous social groups and communities and has no idea what the fuck they are doing outside of those circles. It’s defense mechanism to ensure their “bubble” remains sacred and pure.

    Race doesn’t always play a role in this type of behavior. It can be reliant on other attributes other than race such as religion, attire, etc… in this case it was racial.

    I’m not sure where you reside but understand that there are good people out there, in fact deep down most people are good people, it’s how we are able to keep societies going.

    The occasional jab does happen where there is literally nothing that can be done as it’s just apart of the current environment we’re in. Nothing in the world is risk free, but living in places of lower risk of encounters like this is a big plus compared to places where it could happen 3-4 times a day every single day.

    Best forgive, forget, and move on with living your best life and be thankful of the good people in your life.

    Also… don’t do anything to change the appearance of your given genetics. You are you, you are who you were born to be. Don’t take that away from yourself because deep down there is somebody that doesn’t give a fuck about what people think and whoever wherever that part of you is, embrace it, develop it, and learn to incorporate that self into your daily living. It will take some courage and some pain at times but overall it’s an investment into yourself that will allow you to flourish the way you really want to.

  23. I am an Indian in American and once had a group of white boys throw a donut at me and called me a broke laborer.
    Funny thing is I am pretty sure I have more assets than all of them combined together.
    It’s a reflection of their character not yours

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