Hi! My bf (24m) and I (23f) have been dating for a year now. We’re LDR. Last Tuesday, he and I got into a little argument which left me upset.
He was irritated with me because I accidentally fell asleep on him. I know some of it was my fault, he was really busy and made efforts to make time for me, yet I fell asleep. Though in my defense, I didn’t have any sleep + I was out the whole day for a job interview that I failed + I was feeling sick. He knew all of this. I told him that his attitude towards me is making me upset since I was already feeling down for failing to get the job that I really wanted. After that, he left my message on read and ghosted me.
I’m afraid that maybe I invalidated his feelings as if he had no right to feel what he had felt. He does, but the stress that I get from his cold treatment was something I thought was unnecessary and added weight to my problems. Right now, I don’t know what to do. I feel so unwanted. Is it my fault? Am I a gaslighter? Am I that person who refuses to admit they were wrong? Do I message him again? The last conversation was from when we were arguing (or more like me; he was ignoring me). It has been a week; Do I still wait?
1 comment
Sometimes people have stressful days and need rest. It can happen to you, it can happen to anybody.
Your BF made time for you, and you were unable to reciprocate due to stress. The appropriate response was to say, “That’s rough, what can I do to support you? Or do you need some time to yourself right now?”
Instead you got a childish tantrum.
This is a worrying result, which suggests that the BF thinks this kind of response is appropriate or normal. Assuming you guys re-establish contact and make up, you should be on the lookout for similar reactions in the future, as they could indicate that BF is not mature enough to have an adult relationship.