What are some things to do/to avoid in order to be a cool older (50+) man?

15 comments

1. If you are authentic then that makes you “cool” at any age.

2. A cool man is a confident man who doesn’t care what other people think is cool; he defines that for himself, is comfortable in his own skin, and does what he wants when he wants. This is also what we call a leader.

3. Adopt the mantra “Don’t sweat the small stuff”
   Hint: Unless someone is being hurt, it’s all small stuff.

4. 43 M here. I don’t think “cool” at ages over around 30-35 is the same thing that it is for teenagers. It’s not defined by outward things like clothing or brands or posessions, but by inward characteristics.

   People of all ages seek and are most at ease with an older man who is secure and comfortable with himself. One who has experience, wisdom, calmness, who does some things well and yet is not enamored with his own success.

   A man who has that balance is a cool man.

5. 66+ M, agree with all the above answers

6. Go on adventures and do stupid dangerous things, because women hate boring men and love crazy stories

7. Be in shape, it’s never too late. It’ll also help your quality of life and health. Find pictures of yourself when you looked your best and see if you can still have your hair/beard in that style. Dress classy, don’t dress like a kid. Get nice shoes, not just sneakers all the time.

   Assuming you don’t have a partner, get involved in things. There are lots of single older women taking dancing classes and cooking classes. Even if you’re not looking to date you can make friends and it’s nice to have people fawn over you a little.

   Spend time with people you know, family if possible. Being around kids (in a good way) lets you contribute to the future and keeps your mind active.

   Join a club or explore an interest you have. Older men with no friends are at a high risk for suicide.

   Don’t try to be cool, try to be someone who’s got it together. Be mature and competent, don’t try to relive your youth.

8. I’m only 42, and I teach young men in their late teens/early 20’s how to do a dangerous job. I’ve become like a father figure to them. Plus I have 2 daughters of my own. All these kids asking me advice has easily advanced my age mentally by 10 years. So I’m embracing being a grumpy old man, and shaking my fist at “kids these days.”

9. Knowing when to smoothly pass down tribal wisdoms.

10. Mature.

11. I dunno if fictional characters can be used as a role model, but I always have thought that House of House MD is/was super cool. Maybe look into that.

12. 27F here with a “cool” 45 yr old bf. First, I’m not all that cool. I like to read, write, often stay in and hang out with my dog and 2 cats. My dog is even cooler than me. I’m fine with all that.

    My bf would be described as cool by most standards. He has cool, active hobbies like surfing, skiing, hiking. He likes the same music as me, alt/indie rock. Not just listening to music from your past younger days makes you seem hip imo.
    He’s an amazing abstract painter and really enjoys that. Hobbies and activities that bring you joy or relax you make a person cool, especially if they’re things you can do with others or share with others.

    Aside from his specific interests, what i think makes him cool or perceived as cool to me is that he makes an effort to have new experiences and do new things. I’m not really like that and settle into myself a bit too much.

    Being cool is being well-rounded and an active participant in life. It’s so easy to get too settled into a routine and forget to enjoy your life. It’s really about being comfortable with yourself enough to do things outside your comfort zone.

    There’s nothing wrong with being someone others may describe as boring as long as you’re content with yourself. But the coolest thing imo is someone sharing their interests and passions with others in their life.

    That being said, what attracted me to him was seeing his bookshelf with many of the same books i have and us both enjoying cerebral conversations. He’s cool, but it’s his more nerdy/intellectual qualities that are the coolest to me

13. Stay in shape, wear accessories that indicate spirituality (rings, necklaces), and learn to perform tantric massages. You’ll be very attractive for a certain type of young woman (spiritual and naive).

14. I’m a teenager so I’m probably the age range who’s most suited to answer this question.
    Just be a man of your generation, do things you really like and be respectful,try understanding the waves and culture of the new generation and go beside it, but don’t try to be one of them, don’t copy the terms, don’t do things that are just clearly not suited for your age, you can’t be cool in a young man type of way anymore,so be cool in a ” when i was a teenager ” type of way,bring back funny facts about your early years and never feel yourself as superior to others because you’re older,and people will find you cool

15. The quickest way to be uncool to me is to have uneducated or hyper partisan opinions. I feel like older generations trust single sources of news and opinions too much. Once they spout their Fox-news BS with no nuance or ability to defend their position, my interest in deeper conversations dwindles. I’m not even saying I dislike extreme or stupid political stances, but if you are being spoon fed opinions I don’t have fun talking with you.