My (25f) boyfriend (42m) has bought a ring to propose. He said he would propose this year as we have a house together, both stable jobs and two dogs. We’ve been together 3 years and are both very happy so I don’t understand why he doesn’t just do it?
My worry is that I was so excited for it at the beginning of the year but now it’s becoming a sore subject because we keep planning vacations and work schedules are consistently meaning we have to cancel/reschedule and I know this is when he planned to pop the question. So I asked him when he was planning to propose or if he had a plan because a vacation isn’t looking likely for us and, after having a terrible year, I want to know if I should expect to be more disappointed? He now refuses to talk about it stating I’m ruining the surprise but I’m just tired of waiting. What do I do?
For context: don’t judge the age gap. We are of equal power and finances in the relationship. I moved to his town and I pursued him – for 2 years!! Tragic, I know but we clicked from the get go and we’re good friends first.
He looks a lot younger than his age and is high energy so everyone assumes he is mid 30s and I’m very driven and well spoken so everyone has assumed me to be late 20s.
TL/Dr: Boyfriend won’t propose despite having ring.
5 comments
Why do you expect to be disappointed. It is August. The year ends at the end of December. Do you really think he can’t figure out something, whether or not you two have a trip?
Listen, if you don’t want to wait, you can just propose to him yourself. He’s already bought the damn ring. Quit nagging him.
If your BF has bought a ring, hes most likely already planning the proposal. Proposals dont have to be on vacation so i dont think a canceled vacation is any indication of a proposal not happening.
Just like you said in the comments that you would like to be spoiled that one day, let him! I’m sure hes so excited to surprise you and have everything perfect for you. But you have to give him the chance to make it happen.
Try not to worry, itd suck to have a planned proposal. Let yourself be surprised and stop asking him when/how its happening.
If you’re in a hurry to be engaged, you should propose. Since you’ve ruled that out, and you know he has a ring and a plan and wants it to be a surprise, there’s really nothing you can do but wait. Stop pushing him about it. At the very most, have one more conversation to let him know you’ll be really sad if it doesn’t happen by the end of the year, and then sit back and leave it alone.