Its been a few years since i posted here about Daphne and I .
Daphne and I dated from the time I was 15 until I was 19. She’s about 2 years older than me, and my older sisters best friend. Over the years I’ve gotten help with our issues on this sub a couple of times, and I’ve gotten really good advice.
The last time, we were basically kids, and Daphne got pregnant. I took the advice from the sub. I convinced her that we were too young, and taking care of a baby wasn’t right for us. She had an abortion.
She didn’t take it very well though. She blamed me. She said that I manipulated her into losing our baby. Daphne broke up with me a few weeks later.
I didn’t speak with her for years after that. My sister said that Daphne ghosted her too.
3 weeks ago, I bumped into Daphne. She is as beautiful S ever. i know I’ve never gotten over her, but nice tried to play it cool. I recently got a job with the city, and moved into my own place. Daphne is a school teacher for 3rd grade. I asked her out for coffee. She said no, but we exchanged numbers.
We did end up meeting for dinner a few days later. It was great, if a little awkward. We went on a few more dates. I invited her back to my place. After, she started crying. I tried to find out what was wrong. Daphne said she lied to me. She was so sorry. She knows she couldn’t be forgiven for what she did. I told her it was OK, whatever it was we could work it out. But in my head, I thought maybe she was married or something. I wouldn’t know what to do if that were the case.
She pulled out her phone, and showed me a picture of a little girl. Curly brown hair, brilliant smile. Daphne said she is mine. All those years ago, she didn’t have the abortion. She never told me, she never told my sister. She took care of the baby alone.
It was like time stopped. I was sitting on my bed staring at this picture of a little girl, my daughter. Who I never knew. I didn’t know how to handle it. I threw Daphne out. I cried until my throat was raw. The next morning I called Daphne to apologize for throwing her out.
She wants me to meet my daughter. I told her that I am not sure. That I needed time to think. Daphne said that I had time. She also said that she never stopped loving me.
That was this morning. I am utterly lost here. I have to tell my family about all of this right? They deserve to know don’t they? I think I could be ready to help raise a child, but I don’t have a clue what goes into it. I just started my job, I just moved Into my apartment. Should I forgive Daphne for keeping this from me? How do I just show up in a child’s life after 3 years? Help, what should I do? You guys have done so much for me in the past.
**TL;DR I recently reconnected with my HS sweetheart, who dropped a bomb on me. She had my baby, she never told me, I was led to believe that she had an abortion years ago.**
2 comments
Before you decide if you want to be a part of the little girl’s life, please do a DNA test. You obviously can’t trust your ex.
Didn’t read your post history but based off this post, for sure get a test first off.
Now on the fact she hide this from you can be understandable IMO. See abortion can be a very hard thing for a women to decide/go thru with. If she was scared I could understand her.
Also I would advice to get support from friends and family on this if you have a solid relationship with them.
Then once you know for sure, take baby steps on how you want to handle your future. If she is true in her word here then she will be understanding and patient with you as this is a huge deal.