Should a parent have the right to examine the breasts of her adult daughter?

26 comments

1. >My Mom made me let her examine by breasts because she was scared that I would develop breast cancer

   this is actually fine though.

   ​

   >she said my nipples were not large enough for babies to suckle and proceeded to pull them so that they would appear “larger”

   this is a bit too much.

   I guess you can tell her when you’re feeling uncomfortable with what she did

2. No no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no

   It is amazing that they have such concern for your wellbeing, but that is a massive breach of privacy. That crosses the line by fucking miles bro. Not okay. Not cool. Not alright. Thats fuckin weird dude. That’s actually literally sexual assault. I make no suggestion as to what you should do, but they did not have the right to do any of that. At all. Not even close. It would not be weird if your mother ASKED if she could inspect your breasts. Breast cancer is a big deal. But all of this is many…many steps too far.

3. Your mother worried about you developing breast cancer, I think that part is normal.

   But pulling them out is a Big NO. Not even doctors do that when they examine a patient.

   You should tell her that you were comfortable with this.

4. This is sexual assault and you have every right to feel weirded out by this!!!!!

5. no

6. Bruh, wtf is wrong with some of these moms 😑 playing with your daughters nipples and critiquing their breasts is gross. Boundaries needed here.

7. I’m sorry that your mother did that to you. You are correct in feeling that this is not normal behavior and your mother had no right to do that. She should have demonstrated how to check for cancer and discussed your family history and risks. The check only takes a minute or so and nobody should pull your nipples.

8. I’m sorry. Some mom’s think that their child is an extension of themselves and not really a separate person. You should tell her that made you feel awful. That you are a person and your body belongs to you and that will never happen again.

9. I can’t imagine doing the nipple pull with my daughter. If she needs something checked with her body, I would look at it but never touch her. It’s very uncomfortable.

   Tell your mom she crossed the line. And don’t ever let her talk you into it again.

10. This was extremely inappropriate, perhaps abusive, behavior from your mother.

11. oh gee, this is sexual abuse. or a troll. can’t tell which.

12. No, no, no. She does not have some magical way of finding breast cancer – what, has she got xray eyes? And breast cancer is extraordinarily unlikely in an 18 year-old. At that age the chances are infintesimal, even if you had one of the mutations that makes breast cancer more likely. This is creepy sexual assault masquerading as being a caring mother.

    I am so sorry, OP. I hope you don’t have to have this awful person in your life.

13. 30 minutes touching your breasts then pulling your nipple? This was NOT an examination – which your mom knows as she has been to a doctor for this exam probably several times in her life. I am sorry to tell you your mom sexually abused you. You said you were scared to tell her no. That hopefully means you don’t want a relationship with her even after this assault. As an adult please go NC with mom and get counseling if you want it. If you choose to remain in contact with her, never allow yourself to be alone with her again. Definitely don’t leave future children in her care.

14. That is so odd, she could’ve just told you how to do your own breast exam its super Simple and does not take 30 minutes ever

15. Lol wow not ok..if my dad fondled my.nutts like she did the nips…well it would not end well..

16. Lol is this real? This belongs in r/insaneparents

17. If this is real, that’s sexual abuse. A breast exam does not take 30 minutes and pulling your nipples is not part of it, not does that work. She assaulted you. I’m so sorry, please seek therapy to help process this.

18. Instead, go to a Dr and ask them to show you how to do it yourself. Under no circumstance should you pull nipples. Don’t let your Mother do this again.

19. That’s a big ol Nope right there

20. Unless you left out the part where your mom is a medical doctor or NP and you are unable to conduct a self exam because you have no arms, what your mom did was really inappropriate.

    I’m hoping this is a creative writing exercise otherwise you were just assaulted by your mom.

21. I think is a troll. Can’t be real.

22. > (i.e. she said my nipples were not large enough for babies to suckle and proceeded to pull them so that they would appear “larger”).

    I audibly gasped. What the fuck. It’s not normal.

23. What do you think she was doing? Was it invasive? Did it feel like an assault? You should probablly go to the police then.

    She is doing something that she thinks will save your life but if you have been told by every post on reddit that this is some form of abuse , then by all means, do something about it. I don’t think you have the worse Mom out there.

24. …. I don’t think you should be around your mother anymore.

    This is not normal. In any shape or form.

25. No wtf. That’s what doctors are for. If you didn’t want her to you should have spoke up and said no

26. Its fine for her to be worried about breast cancer, but she absolutely should not have even *asked* to examine you. Show you how to do it yourself, sure! Offer to get a doctor to do it, fantastic! Even if shed just gently mentioned you can go to her if you ever need help with it, that wouldve been appropriate.

    Making you let her grope your chest is wildly out of order, the other stuff is just the icing on top.

    And, since i suspect this is your actual question: yes, you were molested, and im sorry youre having to adjust to that now.