I’m 25M and I have a girlfriend 23F. We’ve been together for almost a year and while we have had some rough patches, I would describe our relationship as pretty great overall.
I have an ex girlfriend 25F who I dated many years ago. We haven’t even talked in about 4 years now. She was the first woman I ever loved and part of me feels like I’ll never fully get over her. I’ve had had 3 year long relationships since I broke up with this girl and for whatever reason, she still has this mental hold on me. I have vivid dreams about her a few times a year and they’re always very sexual and they usually involve me trying to win her back in some way. I had one last night and today I just felt off about everything.
Here’s the catch though. When I really think about it, I know I don’t want to be with her. My ex and I broke up because we were very incompatible, but it’s like my brain doesn’t always register that. She’s objectively the most beautiful girl I’ve been with. I love my girlfriend and she makes me so happy. It wouldn’t even be possible to be with my ex if I wanted to, she moved to a different state after college.
I’m just at a bit of a loss here. Obviously I’m not going to talk to my girlfriend about this and I would never reach out to my ex. I want to make all of these thoughts stop. They’ve been going on for years. Does anyone have any advice or similar stories you can share?
1 comment
I think it might be a good idea to talk to a therapist in order to move on from the ex. You don’t want to give up your future over dreams of your past. Good luck to you.