I (39m) feel like my marriage if fifteen years has been falling apart over the last 4-5 years. There have been two bouts of marriage counseling, both largely unhelpful.
No matter what, we both have resent and barriers to being closer. She seems insistent on continuing to try—just months ago she had all but completely withdrawn from me. I called her out on it and it was a wake up call.
She has made changes. The reality for me is that things feel hollow. I have the love that is built on respect for a human but not anything deeper or more intense. I don’t know if I can change that. It feels like something died.
I don’t know what to do. I’m not sure a future exists where we are once again close. Thanks for hearing me.
1 comment
It appears you two are very disconnected. Think back to the days you dated. What did both of you do to make it fun, loving and exciting? Do you remember? Do you still do it? If not, why not? Look, you both need to keep dating each other. The little things matter. Spending time together as much as possible matters. Your wife is making changes by your account yet you are doing what exactly? You two once found each on an emotional level. You said I do. This is not a lost cause. I have been there. Get back to putting each other first. Do the small things. Date. Get just because flowers. Leave a not of affection and appreciation. It is not rocket science.