Literally today this pretty cute guy (18-21M?) passed me (18F) in my dining hall. We made eye contact for like 2 seconds and I thought he was cute but I’ve always been super anxious and nervous so I kind of just dawdled and finished my food, while looking over at where he was sitting (close-ish to me). I made up my mind to go talk to him, see what was up (which is kind of a big step for me lol), so I finished my food and went to go grab a coffee to have something to drink while I went to sit with him, even though I don’t even LIKE coffee LOL.
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So I dawdle a little again, sipping at my shitty coffee, and then finally go to his table (empty other than him) and ask if I can sit there. He says yes, so I sit across from him and continue sipping. I even took my earbuds out and got off my phone hoping he might start some conversation but he just moved his plates and stuff a little closer to him and kept watching something on his phone. I had a whole conversation planned in my mind and everything but he was busy lol. A few minutes later he finished his meal and got up and left and I didn’t see him again. Should I have gone for it? I think I’m a pretty reasonably attractive girl and honestly I’m a little disappointed. Should I have said something? Should I have started talking to him even if he had his airpods in? Honestly I’m still proud of myself for even going to sit at his table, usually I just admire from afar. Still though. If I see him again I hope I have the courage to sit with him and actually strike up a conversation.
TLDR: Possibly fucked up a chance with a cute guy because I was too nervous to talk to him. How should I have known whether he (and others like him) was actually interested?
2 comments
Imo you already showed that you were interested in him. If there were other places available to sit (obviously since you didn’t sit there to start with), but chose to sit intentionally close to him, then you showed interest.
There must be a reason he didn’t reciprocate. Perhaps he was shy? Perhaps he’s into guys? Either way, strange decision for him not to try to talk to you considering the interest you already showed.
But go you for having the confidence to do so! Maybe next time kindly ask what they’re watching or something, as an ice breaker and a way for them to know you actually want to talk.
Guys will almost never get hints like this. He almost surely had no idea you were interested. Plus society has conditioned guys to think it’s not okay to romantically pursue girls in most public situations by shaming it as creepy. So when girls try to give off subtle hints like this nowadays, and guys are unsure they choose the better safe than sorry approach.