Essentially the title. I (18F) would love to be in a serious, committed relationship with a young man, I’d say between 18-23. I think any older than that, and we’d be in completely different periods of our lives. The men who approach me are all between, let’s say 25-55 (generous with the 25). Mostly in their thirties. I know it’s quite the far-fetched question but I wanted to know if anyone had any advice on how to just… attract younger men, while still being true to myself (not interested in hookups, casual sex, partying, etc… seems to be what a lot of young guys are into, is definitely not for me).

5 comments
  1. It’s extremely difficult to have a healthy, stable, committed relationship with guys around your age. Usually there is some level of toxicity with guys that want serious relationships at that age, so be on the lookout for that. I suggest just looking among your peers, whether you are in college or high school and, if you like absolutely no one, you can give dating apps a shot (just narrow down the age-range).

    Don’t go for the flashiest, best looking guys, for the most part those guys are very difficult to get to commit, as they have too many options willing to settle for less. Cute and dorky with a great personality works out a lot better, trust me.

    Watch out for any signs of them being controlling or having trust issues. Watch out for love-bombing. If you’re getting mixed signals – they’re not that into you/only looking for hookups. Trust your gut. Good luck!

  2. 1. Talk to people in your life that are the age you like: school, work, everyday life, hopefully friends.

    2. Adjust you expectations (they don’t need to be perfect or tick every box on your prince charming list) and go on safe dates with guys in the age you prefer. Think of it as a learning experience. Do try to make if fun. Do set boundaries. Do make sure you are safe and aim for having a good experience yourself.

    3. Talk to your friends in real life about your struggles and feelings … and distrust everyone and everything online.

    Edit: 44m just incase you couldn’t tell from my advice.

  3. Are you in school? Go to school events/clubs. Get on the apps. You’re not doing anything wrong, much older men attracted to you because you’re young and they feel they can manipulate you. You just have to ignore them.

  4. I had a similar problem. I was attracting 18-19-year-olds when I was 24. Like you I wanted to date women my own age.

    Turns out my mask and lean body weight made me look younger. Fortunately, all I had to do was take off my mask because I have a mustache and broad jaws that make me look older. I also updated my wardrobe to match my age.

    You may need to do the opposite. Modify your appearance and clothes to make yourself look younger.

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