how has dating someone smarter than you gone?

33 comments

1. We aren’t together anymore, but we were both at university doing different degrees so I had expertise in different areas than her. So I wouldn’t say that I was that much of a drag on her. But she was 100% more intelligent but it didn’t affect our relationship at all.

2. When she used her intelligence to create an entire lifetime of narratives and situations where she is, was, and ever shall be THE victim. Instead of working towards healing and bettering herself, she found it easier to rationalize it that everyone was imposing on her and marginalizing her, and that’s where her problems stemmed from, not the fact that she never worked towards improving herself in any way.

3. I stare directly at the guy pissing next to me.

4. For the first time ever, at 32 years old, I am dating a woman that is undoubtedly smarter than me. We are both very smart people, but the way we challenge each other and what I learn from her is something I will always cherish.

5. Haven’t found one. These bitches are dumb as fuck 😤
   Jk. It’s me. I’m bitches.

6. Pretty intense intellectual conversations. Lots of humor. Hilarious situations seem to just pop up constantly. Planning our date nights is never boring. Plus, we’re still together, so that’s a positive.

7. Never dated anyone smarter than me, if they were smart they wouldnt date me.

8. Smartness is relative. Most of the time they are smarter in some things and I’m smarter in others. I’ve never dated a girl for longer then a week who was just plain dumb at everything.

9. Well. I choose to date a smart woman, not a bitch. So she respects all my opinions, we discuss things and she doesn’t pretend to be smarter. Why should I be anything but happy for her and proud.

10. Someone’s gotta be smarter

11. I dated and was absolutely in love with a gal way back in 2002 who was smarter than me. I was 26, she was 21. there was undeniable, unbelievable, absolutely out-of-this-world chemistry between us and We had an absolutely fantastic time together, but she was certainly smarter than me and on another level. I mean, I’m no intellectual slouch, but I wasn’t there with her intellectually. She ended up pulling the plug on the relationship and I was crushed for years thinking I would never connect like that with someone again. Wrote off the idea completely, in fact and focused on bachelor lifestyle. Years later, she reached out to me out of the blue on FB. She’s a neuroscientists married to a neuroscientists and thriving in life with a beautiful family. She then revealed that, while she loved her family and her life, she never was able to achieve that level of intuitive connection we experienced and had been harboring regret for breaking up with me. It was a bit of a validating conversation because I had been walking around for almost 18 years thinking that she was out of my league and the intellectual aspect was my shortcoming. It was a weight off my shoulders. I straight up asked her if that was factor in the breakup and she said it never even occurred to her that she may have been smarter than me, only that she, at 21, wasn’t ready for the type of relationship our connection warranted. She found the entire premise absurd.

    The lesson here is this: chemistry is what matters most. Intellectual discrepancies, so long as there is no shaming involved, are comparable to any other type of discrepancy that may exist in a relationship: one of you is probably a better cook than the other, for example. If you connect deeply and on multiple levels, does it really matter if one of you cooks better than the other? Don’t worry about it: love her well and fuck her real hard on a regular basis the intellectual discrepancy won’t matter.

12. if you ever think youre the smart one in the relationship, that other person knows something that you dont know

13. Every woman I’ve dated is book smarter than me. I make up for it with common fucking sense. Never been out matched there lol

14. This is just my experience, and I know not all women like this.

    In general, the smarter women I have dated were all driven, had a plan. Knew how many kids they were having and what schools they were go into apply to.

    Like they have that shit all mapped out. And I get it. But as the guy walking into that, it feels weird like I’m being type cast and I’m auditioning for a guest roll in this ready for tv hallmark movie.

    So yeah, I prefer intelligent, but not as smart as me. I’m a rocket scientist, so this leave me a big window there.

15. Great! We have been married for 10 years and always rails me for not being book smart.😎 You give me real-life things like working on a car, house maintenance, yard work, finances, and overall common street smarts, I win any day 🤣

16. We never had an intelligence dick measuring contest or anything, but I almost married the smartest girl I ever dated.

17. I’m not dating her yet, but she is majoring in mathematics and I’ll be majoring in chem soon, and she constantly talks about math, which I suck at, and it’s honestly so cute bc she gets so giddy about it and I love it.

18. Great! We’re married now.

19. I don’t know if she was actually smarter than me, but the one woman I dated expressly for her intelligence made me fucking miserable.

20. Currently talking to someone who wants to be a pediatric assistant… I don’t have even have a degree. I’ll let you know how it goes

21. She worked for Google. It was the best until I eventually became as smart as her, she didn’t like that.

22. My gf has a high IQ, I have never gotten IQ tested – but since her IQ is pretty rare I assume she is smarter than I am.

    She is very anxious in general, but she definitely has moments when I think to myself “damn that is smart” – and I rarely ever just pause and think that for most people. I’m sure as she ages, and the anxiety dissipates, there might be a little more of a gap between us. I really don’t bring it up much, because it never has bothered me. To me, I can actually ask her shit and get decent advice. She is well thought, well spoken, communicates, expresses empathy – overall a really well rounded girl. So I suppose her intelligence gives her intellectual reliability, to where I can seek advice and get actual decent guidance on things.

23. Well somehow she had a lapse in judgement because she married me. It’s not that bad, except for when we argue. She wins arguments even when she’s dead wrong, so yeah haha.

24. I’ve never dated someone smarter than me in general but I have dated people who were very knowledgeable about something I had no interest in. It didn’t really matter at all.

25. No idea. I never dated anybody smarter than myself.

26. Last girlfriend had a Mensa IQ about 15 points higher than me. She was one of the funniest people I’ve ever met. She was a complete mess of a person, but fuck I loved her.

    The deadly thing about her was she had what appeared to be total recall. Great when you lose your keys, a pain in the fucking dick while you’re fighting with her and she brings up some shit you said a year before

27. I dated someone smarter than me before. It kind of sucked but it was only because she tried to lord it over me whenever we argued. The only other time it sucked was when she went on her super long tech rants.

28. If it ever happens I’ll let ya know.

29. If we go by academic achievement, then yes, I’ve dated people smarter than me.

    I feel it never had any relevance for or influence on our relationship. Probably because at that point, being an expert in your field does not have any influence on veryday life. We both would have a similar level of basic educaton, and that’s all that’s needed.

30. Never known.

31. Never happened.

32. I’ve never done it. I’ve dated women who were roughly as smart as me but never someone clearly smarter. In general, a woman won’t choose a man who is dumber than they are. Women want to date up, not down.

33. Pretty good. Our kids are smart as hell