recognize your worth sounds so dumb but it’s really true

tldr; left a toxic person and going on a date with a decent guy made me realize how common it is to not only settle for awful people, but be blinded by the toxic relationship and think that’s all we deserve.

i (21f) recently wasted about 8 months of my life in a relationship with an insanely toxic guy.

i loved the way he treated me as friends, how he was in public, and the sweet things he’d say, but overall in a “relationship” sense i hated who he seemed to turn into. i once begged him to treat me like a human being and he said “respectfully though i don’t really have to treat you like anything” AND I CONTINUED TO SEE HIM because i loved him as a person and i didn’t realize i could have anything beyond the “love” he gave me.

i cut him off 3 weeks ago and i have never been so confident and sure of what i deserve. i went on a date with a guy from my hometown and he opened the car door for me when he picked me up, took me out for food and paid, complimented me in a non sexual way, and we watched a movie after, during which he kissed me on the forehead and just cuddled with me – didn’t expect anything else.

it made me realize i had been settling for way below the bare minimum and that i deserved to be treated so much better, but if i hadn’t left the toxic relationship i would’ve thought that’s all i ever deserved.

don’t settle for less just because you love them, or because they have their good days that “make up” for the bad. it’s scary leaving what you’re comfortable with but if you know it’s not right you OWE yourself the chance at finding out what you really deserve.