My (18F) Bf (20M) is very scared of his parents and older sister (21?F). He’s the youngest in his family, and he has a really nice temper.
His parents and sibling all get upset rather easily, and when they do get mad it’s kinda scary (full-on yelling and screaming.)
Because my bf has the nicest temper, he ends up the scapegoat of the family. Whenever they get mad or have a bad day, they usually end up venting their frustrations on my bf (not sure if it’s intentional) my bf doesn’t really fight back because they’re family.
Once he was up late talking to me through Discord, his sister stomped into his room and yelled at him to do the dishes. (It wasn’t an emergency, he promised to do them later) and when he said no, and that he was talking to me (it was a videocall so I could see her yelling at him) She waved hi to me and proceeded to try and take his keyboard from him and threatened to turn off his pc (a desktop) if he didn’t do the dishes immediately. He said no and tried to fight back but his sister started wrestling him with full force and after a while, he disconnected from the call. (Pc was turned off).
He is really scared of his older sister, to the point where he isn’t comfortable doing anything in his own room if his sister was at home with him because hes scared of being yelled at again. He gets anxious whenever he hears footsteps upstairs (have to go downstairs to his room). He’s too scared to do almost anything in fear of his sister coming in and yelling at him.
I’m not sure how to support him as his gf, we are long distance and I can’t do anything to comfort him when I’m at school or work. I’m worried about him, and he’s constantly super anxious because of this environment at home. How should I support him further? I’m having my final exams (university entrance exams) soon and I will be too busy to hang out with him as much, I don’t know what to do.
1 comment
If the situation is as bad as you describe, the best thing for him to do is get a job (if he doesn’t have one already) and start aggressively saving money to find a new living situation. You can support him by urging him to start this process. Emphasize that it is very important that he starts a new bank account at a new bank than where his parents bank. If he has an account from when he was a minor they likely are still listed on it and could wipe him out. Best to be safe than sorry.
All this being said, I am not suggesting or advising you and him to move in together. I have no idea how long you two have been together, and that’s an important factor to consider. But he should get a new place with roommates.