Ok so problems started about as soon as my BF and I got together. His Best Friend hates my guts for some reason and has been harassing me since Day 1. I’ve blocked him and BF has taken to making the best friend think we broke up and keeping our relationship hidden.
Best Friend checks BFs phone and so I can’t text my BF or Best Friend would tell me to stop from some other source of media. Best Friend stalks my media and gets his boyfriend, other best friend, and ex to stalk my media for him.
So I went on vacation for a graduation celebration and the day before BF and I went on a date as we wouldn’t see each other for a week. We had an amazing day and he even told me our relationship is the healthiest one he’s been in. At dinner he asked me how I’ve been feeling and I’ve told him how I was angry and upset that his Best friend will not leave me alone unless I was gone from the relationship and I’ve expressed thinking about leaving cause I felt horrible for putting the BF in this situation when he’s already been through so much. BF shut down and once we got back to my car he held me and was shaking (He doesn’t do this so I knew he wasn’t ok) basically in his own way telling me to not leave.
We went to somewhere private and we made out (I let him make the moves) and we had so much fun as he was teaching me to skateboard. We even video chatted that night since the best friend was away for the week as well. During the duration of my vacation we texted everyday and we said I love you everyday. The day I come back he texts me telling me to not text him as Best Friend was back home. He texts me later in very bold letters meaning he was excited to tell me something about him getting a Squishamelon and I said for him to show me. 4 days later he read it and I was worried so I text him over the course of 4 days twice leaving a day in between each text to only get a text from the best friend to my Instagram to his Facebook (I didn’t know he could do that so it wasn’t blocked) and it was of him and my BF telling me to not text BF. I was obviously furious and hurt.
It’s been 4 weeks of no contact at all and idk what to do. So should I confront him about this ghosting? Do y’all think he’ll come back?
Extra Info – BF lives with Best Friend due to toxic family. BF and I known each other for 3 years just as long as he’s known Best Friend. Best Friend and I used to be friends but as soon as Bf and I got together was when the harassment started. BF has told me that he wanted to marry me, he’s discussed names for our kids, has talked about moving in together when we were both done with college, expressed wanting to show me his home town. Has told me that he much rather be with me rather bthen Best Friend and has told me he’s happier with me. Also he’s still friends with me on Facebook and has never asked me to give back anything of his that he gave me. This was just random.
Relationship Info – BF has had toxic relationships in the past where he was cheated on and used. I as well and we help each other with our trauma and triggers. He’s helped me with my depression and always stops me before I do something stupid. He even made a step system when it came to us doing the deed cause of my trauma where I made the moves and he made sure I was comfortable with anything fun we did. He also was the one to ask me out and he was a blushing shy mess when he did it was adorable. He also always tried to get me to make decisions instead of me always going with what he wanted. He would initially refuse to do anything unless we did what I wanted. He’s done everything to show he respects me and he treats me amazingly except for now which gets me so confused and hurt.
5 comments
As long as you want to perfect being a door mat you should keep waiting. When you’re tired of being a door mat just move on. He does not have enough respect for you to deserve your companionship.
You need to ask yourself if you really want to be with somebody that will not stand up to somebody and lets them controle his life.
my first boyfriend did this to me. he had cheated on me with another girl, and generally just treated me like garbage (which i only realized after the fact). rose colored glasses are a hell of a drug. i trusted him so deeply that i couldn’t see all the ways that he was terrible. and i subconsciously hid his flaws and hurtful things he did to me from others. break up with him before he has more power over you. i get it i really do but i swear your life will improve exponentially. you shouldn’t be dealing with any of that.
Value yourself, your life, your time, your happiness. If he’s willing to hide you he’s willing to leave you. Bestie is a d**k, he’s not going to stop harassing you or threatening him because it’s working.
BF and his Bestie are not putting off their lives to make you happy so why are you doing for them?
It honestly sounds like they’re in a relationship and you’re the side chick.
She is “harassing” you saying “don’t text my bf” and she lives with him. There is something clearly going on. He even said he has to hide your relationship and blocks you. Omg come on.
He only texts you when she’s on vacation?? I mean come on he has to stop texting you because she’s “coming home” and then ghosts you???
Am I the only seeing this???