I feel that there are a lot of tips/tricks/experiences in dating that are not specific enough to this age range. Ex. What are the females mindset around this age, when to go for the kiss, do women need more time to get comfortable with you at this age, what are the women looking for most the time…..on and on.
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As a 43M, my perception is that most tips/tricks/experiences are for your age group. It’s interesting how perceptions can be so different.
Despite that, you have to understand that there’s no one answer. There are literally millions of women in this category and they are generally going to follow a bell curve in distribution on pretty much any topic. So if there’s something you’re looking for, it’s out there, but it may be hard to find. However, if you’re asking where is the peak of the bell curve that’s probably a bit easier to identify.
I’ve read that more and more women are career focused in their early 20’s. Most date, but they are generally unenthusiastic about the challenges of dating – though those challenges are not the same for all woman. So there are more women that choose to remain single or will date casually when convenient, but are less likely to commit a lot of energy to finding a relationship – particularly a serious one.
I know it’s not what you are asking about, but realistically young men should ALL be focused on developing soft skills at that age (or younger). It’s basically not taught in school and it’s probably the most influential set of skills that anyone can have in both personal and professional relationship. More specifically, learning how to COMMUNICATE effectively, develop and maintain TRUST, and honing your EMPATHY skills will be invaluable to you for the rest of your life. Even if you think you’re good at those things, you can get MUCH better.
These skills will help you establish rapport with partners (or potential partners) and you’ll have a better inclination on when someone is open to your advances and when someone is looking for more.
(MOST NOT ALL) Girls our age generally pursue the guys who have the most friends, highest status, fittest, best looking, best conversational skills, busy and productive lives, with other girls in their life that prove that they know how to treat girls.
If you fulfill ANY of these criteria then you will be ahead of the majority of guys our age. The more boxes you tick the more likely a girl will want to pursue YOU. She will make it obvious when she wants you to kiss her. You need to find your confidence and have the mindset that she want’s you, not the other way around. Most girls our age are bombarded with compliments and attention every day (depending on how attractive she is). Most guys are persistent and annoying. It is rare for them to ever find a guy who doesn’t do this.
Start asking what do girls want? and start to become that man.
You must overcome the “nice guy” mindset and start to see yourself as the prize, not her. BUT you must live in reality. You cannot see yourself as the prize if YOU ARE NOT THE PRIZE. Build your attributes as a man, gain your confidence and the girls will come to you.
– Don’t give girls free attention
– Don’t pay for anything
– Be responsible for your own contraception
– At 21, any energy you spend on women would be better spent on your physique, your career, or your finances.