I [M24] recently found out a good friend of mine [F24] has secretly hated me for the past 10 years. Do I confront her or just let it go?

So last week I tried to set up a beach day with my friends. Abby, Anthony, and Brian. Brian couldn’t come but Abby and Anthony could. Abby said she’ll invite our friend Kayla and we’ll go. Next day I get a text from Abby saying she can’t do Saturday but they want to go out Friday night. She said she’ll lmk about the details. Whole week goes by and I didn’t hear anything. Friday night I see all of them out at a bar on their Instagram stories. So I sent Abby a text just asking if she had an issue with me and that I felt left out of my own plans. I’ve known her since kindergarten. And she says no bad blood and that she just forgot. She apologized about 3 times to me over the course of the weekend which made me question the trueness of her apology. Ant called me and explained that they forgot about me and I wasn’t invited to Abby’s apartment for the pregame because it wasn’t his place to intrude since it wasn’t his apartment. I smelled shit because we’ve known each other for 15 years and it’s never been an issue when we’re over at each other’s houses. That wouldn’t have stopped me from being invited so there’s something else there.

So Abby had a huge crush on my friend P. She liked him, he didn’t like her because he liked another girl in the group who he’s now dating. As a way of getting back at P and his girlfriend Abby basically kicked them out of the group. And then that’s when I stopped getting invited to things because I’m closer to P than anyone else in the group. Usually in the past P would text me the plans and that was it. Turns out there’s been a group chat without me where they make plans and P says he’s bringing me along because Abby doesn’t want me involved in anything. She literally asked P “why does he think he can hang out with us?” And my friend P responded saying that everyone else in the group is friends with him except you and that she can either deal with it or stay home. So P confronted her and she admitted to him saying that “I was never his friend. I can’t fucking stand him. I hated when you brought him around.” She would make plans and purposely leave me out. But P would bring me and would tell her If I can’t bring him I’m not coming and she said fine bring him. And for the past 10 years I’ve been oblivious to it. I did nothing to her. I’ve been nothing but a good friend and this is how she treats me behind my back. Any time we went out she would tell P “why are you bringing him? Why is he coming?” This is going all the way back to high school. For reference, we’re multiple years out of college now. And P wouldn’t tell me because if he did he knew that I probably would never go out with them again which he’s right. So for the last 10 years she’s been fake nice to me. She wishes me a happy birthday, she talks to me when we’re out. She told me when I go on a date let her know and she’ll help me pick out an outfit and she’s happy for me. She would text me at 3 am when she got home from the bar just letting me know she got home safe. She would tell me to text her when I got home safe. She literally told me to my face you’re the one person in this group that no one has a problem with. Well that’s bullshit. She came to me a month ago and had an accounting question because I’m an accountant. She asked how my parents were doing. So she was being fake nice to me because she wanted to use me? We didn’t really speak much anyway unless we went out which now I know why.

So the whole reason why she hates me? It’s because when I go out with them I ruin her image because according to her I’m short, ugly, I look too young, and it makes guys not want to approach her when I’m around her because it makes her look bad. So instead of telling me to my face I don’t want to be your friend, she goes behind my back and says all this but to my face treats me fine. And here I am thinking I’ve had a good friend for the past 15-20 years and she secretly despises me. She’s a nurse and when the pandemic hit I was the only one to reach out to her to see if she was ok. She lives 4 blocks from me so I told her if she needed anything to lmk. Only thing she wanted from me was to fuck off. Like why would she go out of her way and put in effort to be this fake? I can’t comprehend it. And if she’s confronted she manipulates and gaslights the person saying that’s so not true P is lying he’s insane don’t listen to him.

So P came by my house last night and told me all this after he got off the phone with her where they basically put it all out and she just spilled everything. P thought it was time to finally tell me. I feel stupid. Ant knew this whole time but never told me because he didn’t want to hurt my feelings. He doesn’t know I know. And I had hunches that there was something off. In high school they all went to Nashville for her birthday. I was the only one who didn’t get invited. Last week they went to Vegas for her birthday. Didn’t invite me. We went down the shore to her beach house one day and I drove with Ant. She said me and Ant can spend the night so we can get up early and go on the boat the next day. Turns out she wanted Ant to stay and me to go home. When she found out I was in their prom house back in senior year of high school she threw a fit. Last Labor Day me, Abby, Ant, and P went to the beach. The night before she put Ant and P in a group chat basically telling them how she doesn’t want me to come and that I’m going to ruin her day. So back to Friday night. She never forgot. She purposely left me out of my own plans. And according to her words she said I don’t want people I don’t like in my apartment. Which was why I was never invited. And the rest of the group has no idea that she hates me. There’s 5 other guys and 2 girls. All of the guys in the group love me. As far as the girls go idk. But because she’s the one who makes the plans, since her family has a boat, and a beach house, and she’s the only one who has her own apartment, she basically calls the shots and the rest of the group just follows. So I’m not getting invited out anymore. And they won’t speak up bc they have no clue. And even if I tell them they’ll believe her not me because they’re closer with her. Oh and she admitted to P that she has control over everyone in the group and she’s glad we’re not in it anymore because she hates us. She hates P because he wouldn’t date her. She hates me because I make her look bad. Her exact words were I’m better than him. I just am.

Needless to say I don’t feel very good rn. I’ve always struggled with my self image and I thought my friends would be the one to be judgement free and help me out with anything. I guess not. I feel stupid and kind of just want to bury my head in the sand. I told my one coworker because we’re kinda close and she said who could absolutely hate you? So that was nice. But this is someone I grew up with and all through middle school, high school, and college she secretly despised me but would put up with me even though she didn’t want me there. So I can imagine the amount of shit talking that went on over the years. And I was oblivious to all of it.

My one cousin thinks she’s just jealous of me because of how well I get along with everyone but I don’t think that’s it. I think she’s miserable and wants to bring me down with her. Regardless I’m annoyed that I never had a friend to begin with.

Im writing all this because we’re supposed to all get together Saturday at P’s house. I’m actually invited this time because it’s P who’s planning it and he’s my best friend. She doesn’t know I know she hates me. I’m wondering if I confront her about it or just let it be and then cut contact with her all together. Part of me wants to let it go and just move on. I have enough problems as is. The other part of me wants to hear her say it to my face since she hasn’t been able too all these years. What would be the best course of action?

TL:DR Good friend of 15 years secretly has hated me all this time. Do I confront her about it or just cut all contact and let it go?