I would say most people I’ve come across so far in my time on online dating sites, and I’m trying to be inclusive of both genders here, have absolutely not had their shit together enough to have a long term relationship. Whether they’re constantly trying to hit me up for money due to being broke themselves, or not having a job that pays them well enough to live independently, or not being emotionally mature enough with overall life experience. Are my standards simply too high? Possibly. But if you’re hitting me up for “gas money to make it to the first date” or making me pay for everything and put in all the work/effort, however attractive you/your pictures are I’m not going to be interested in the end. I’m just growing tired of wading through all the BS, I’m 30 and becoming too old for other peoples shit when I’ve got enough of my own to deal with and fix. I use to think most people had it better than me and put them on a pedestal, and am just tired of being let down when it doesn’t meet those initial hopes and expectations. I simply refuse to light myself on fire to keep someone else warm.
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lots of people are fucking idiots who are at best good at keeping up the facade of having their shit together
If most means more than 50%, then absolutely yes.
No your standards are not to high. The bar is in hell on these dating apps. And that’s very bold of them to ask for money from someone they barely know. Its just a LOT of crappy people on dating sites that you have to dig through and that can be draining. Finding the “perfect” person is like finding a needle in a haystack nowadays.
Some are worth it. Keep trying. 😌 I know it’s hard.
Keep those standards high! I say get off the dating apps and see if you can meet someone in-person. I’m not in the headspace to date, but once I’m ready I don’t have OLD as part of my plan. There are too many fake people out in the world and I don’t want to waste my time 🙅🏽♀️ Best wishes!
No…. No they aren’t….
Wow. That will certainly wear you down. I’ve had the opposite experience, where more like 75% do have their life together and are ready for emotional investment towards a long term relationship, but I’m dating the 30+ crowd. I do ask potentials, what was their longest relationship, and if they’ve ever lived with a partner before.
Absolutely.
I don’t use online dating but the more I hear about it on Reddit the more of a shitshow it seems to be.
Try dating in real life if you are able to. It’s a much more pleasant experience.
The singles ones at least. The ones worth it got snatched up before 30.
What I noticed is that even decent, nice people from afar, once close enough will prove emotionally crippled and incapable of too deep of a relationship. I don’t think you’re jaded. I think most people have serious issues.