I asked my boyfriend to call or text me first as I’m always contacting him first.
I decided not to contact him first to see if he would. It’s been 3 days since we last spoke. He has not contacted me in any form what’s so ever
. Should I contact him?

24 comments

  2. a relationship should be a two way street. If u feel like he’s not meeting (or willing to meet) you halfway, don’t settle for less.

  3. That’s several red flags. I couldn’t go one day without some form of contact with my partner. You should just leave him, that’s messed up.

  5. Do not contact him! Just move on quietly. His lack of interest is the only closure you need

  7. If you do contact him, it should only be to tell him it doesn’t work that way. Relationships are a two way street – I’m doing the same thing atm. Told him today. Let’s see if we stay together..

  8. If he’s comfortable going that long without talking to you, I’d make sure he couldn’t reach you when he changes his mind.

  9. I’m not a huge fan of testing people like this, but you got the answer you were looking for.

  10. Not a chance…you asked for something very basic and you can’t even get that. If I were in your shoes, unless I knew my partner would going someplace out of cellphone range, I’d consider myself broken up if three days elapsed and I’d not heard from them.

  12. He seems to be comfortable with your absence, find someone who wants to be with you and can’t wait to talk to you, they’re out there.

  13. If someone wants to talk to you they will make the time. You have talked to about the situation and told him what you needed, don’t contact him and if he does finally contact wait awhile before you respond. Take this time to think about what kind of relationship you want and decide if this relationship meets your needs.

  14. He’s not a partner and certainly not your boyfriend. If he doesn’t care to call you for a day, he’s not the man for you. When a guy is your boyfriend, he shows it with his actions. Dump the Deadbeat and find a real lover.

  16. I’m in the same boat. I haven’t heard from my bf (or ex-bf) in 10 days. I consider myself single now.

  17. No…you gave him his chance. You probably need time to heal and take care of yourself. Be with supportive friends.

  18. Hmmm….kinda torn on this one. We need more info – did you make this a demand or ultimatum? If you said something like “you better call/text me first because I’m not gonna do it” it could be seen as a “shit test” and a power move on your part. BUT, if you discussed it rationally and without emotion and simply said “hey, I feel like I’m always expected to call/text you first…I think it’s only fair that you reach out to me” and he didn’t then, yeah, he’s disrespecting you and not worth the time or effort.

    Many of the responses here are based on the small amount of info you’ve given and may be kneejerk advice without knowing how it all went down…but that happens a lot here.

  19. Maybe hes busy chasing his goals, if you miss him reach out. If he doesn’t in one week have a open conversation about it. If that doesn’t work leave

  20. Sometimes our partners suck at texting first. My boyfriend is horrendous at texting anyone. But he would never go three days without contacting me in some form. I would atleast get a call from him once a day on his way home from work and maybe a text. This is sad and not a good sign. I couldn’t be with someone like this and I would end it

  21. We’re each responsible for doing half the work in a relationship. If you stop doing *their* half and they don’t get motivated to do it, the relationship will fade out or move to a less involved level. As it should.

  22. 1 day is acceptable if a bf works 16 hour workdays or has a death in the family..2 days is most likely a drug problem..3 is he has other girls who are hotter or more important. This guideline can work for girls or guys who enjoy going MIA.

  23. My last breakup actually ended like this. We had a history of just randomly going no contact with each other, almost always because of her. Then weeks or a couple months later we’d get back together after getting a late night text from her, lol. We had been dating on and off for almost 2 years.

    However, this last time, I took her out for her birthday, spent the night at her place, and left after breakfast. We texted sporadically during the following week but she kept rescheduling our dates, which she had been doing more of lately.

    Eventually I told her that I know she’s busy and to just hit me up if she has time to get dinner or something with me, she replied with a 🙂 and that was the last I heard from her. That was over 4 months ago. So sometimes relationships just fade out like that.

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