As a woman, I always feel like I need to get more emotionally invested in someone before feeling like I want to kiss them (maybe second or third date). However most men I’ve gone out with have the expectation to kiss/make out on a first date. When I refuse, it always makes the situation awkward and makes it seem like I’m not interested (even if I am). I do explain to them that I prefer to take things slow and get to know each other more, but guys don’t seem to really get it. How do you deal with this?
7 comments
You can just tell your standards to them on the first date or just date a guy who you’re really interested in.
As a guy, I feel there is pressure to kiss on the first or second date at the latest, otherwise you’ll get friend zoned. If this is how you feel you should just be honest (sounds like what you’re doing), and if they like you they’ll stick around. Sure they might take it as a gentle “I’m not interested”, but it’ll be up to you to convince em. Maybe let them know before? Idk lol
As a guy. We are simple as fuk. If I asked and you said to me “I’m not comfortable it” or ” I don’t kiss on the first date”. Then you continue to text me like later to show your interested then i’m thinking okay she likes me but she wants to take things slow.
I won’t kiss on a first date unless I know the person I’m dating is okay with it. Boundaries are extremely important and I will respect them. Honestly, being blunt about your feelings is the best way to handle it.
Guy here, I also agree kissing on first date is something to be avoided. Alot of guys are trying to get a make out/kiss/hookup in (not saying thats bad but there is a conflict of interest) what I am saying is the right guy wont run from something like that 😀
If it feels right, absolutely.
I discovered everyone sees this differently. I don’t read into kissing that much. Its not something special to me. For the women I have dated, slight majority have read something into it