How to approach and initiate reconciliation after someone ghosted you?

26 comments

1. You don’t re-engage with someone who ignored you. Them ignoring you tells you they either need space or are not interested.

   Stop hoping. They may reach back out, but fact is they probably will not.

   Ghosters rarely reply to your attempts anyways, and you will look like a dick.

   Just don’t, I made this mistake alot.

   Bottom line: They are not interested in your messages, friendship, or love.

2. Do not reach out if someone is ghosting you.

3. You don’t, give yourself time and move on. Don’t force contact, allow whatever it was to be done and move on.

4. Why do you wanna reconcile with someone who ghosted you?

5. You honestly don’t. I’ve been in this situation a thousand times over and it’s very annoying, but if you take time to live life and accomplish your tasks, it’ll get better, I promise!

6. If there was what seemed like a genuine connection that they invested significant time in then I will send a message saying how it made me feel – with ZERO expectation. The purpose of doing so is not to “make them talk to me”. It is to express my feeling to them so a) I let it out and don’t get bitter, and b) sometimes it clicks in the part of them that’s still human and they consider the impacts of their actions on others. A couple responded and one actually empathized and said what they should have said instead of ghosting (I thanked them and left it at that, I was on my way to another date) and the other revealed themself to be the asshole they appeared to be. I never ghost unless someone is abusive or scary. Even if the chat is young I always make at least a tiny effort to treat the other person humanely and say something like “this isn’t a good fit, best wishes”

7. I would say ghost her irl. That means act like you don’t know/care about her, don’t acknowledge her. When you do this one of two things will happen. Either she will initiate something with you (so that could mean some interest is still there) or she won’t acknowledge you (so that means she’s not interested at all). That’s pretty basic and I can get you more details if you share more details about circumstances in which you’ll see each other irl.

8. When someone ghosts its on them to reach out, and even then they have to make up for the ghosting.

9. You become happy with someone else and show it to the world. That will make the other person be the one to approach you, but by that time you won’t need her no more.

10. There is nothing to be reconciled if the person ghosted you, just meant to move on and don’t push any further.

    The reason could be anything. It could be you or it could be that person’s personal issue. It doesn’t matter.

    Just move on and see how things play itself out.

    This assumes it’s about personal friendship/acquaintance, not workplace collaboration, though.

11. Just move on.
    I have a three strike policy just to convince myself I’ve done everything from my end.
    If still no change I just walk away out of self respect for myself.

12. Don’t

13. depends on a whole lot, ie how long you’d been seeing eachother, how serious it was, the strength of the relationship, whether youve had sex or not, what terms had you agreed to, whether you will still see them around or not, etc. i hope the reconciliation youre looking for is just closure and being on good terms, not reigniting the connection. you shouldnt want to rekindle something with someone that didnt even have the decency to be forthright and tell you theyre no longer interested.

    ive been ghosted a handful of times and ive only ever confronted one person about the ghosting. i confronted him for two reasons: 1. some things he did to me while we were still talking was really, really messed up and that alone needed to be confronted. he needed to be informed his behavior was not okay (pressuring me to do stuff i wasnt comfortable with and sexually manipulating me.) 2. we are colleagues! we dont work at the same place, but our jobs are intertwined so we see each other a lot and run in the same circles and have a lot of mutual friends. the awkwardness between us was ruining a lot of my fun, so i wanted to settle it.

14. Don’t

15. You don’t.

16. Listen man, I checked your post history and your situation is bordering on (and likely already at) obsession. In every single post you’ve made, and you’ve made a ton about this girl, people have told you the exact same thing you’re being told here. Your obsession with her is visible and it’s unhealthy.

    Let me make this as clear as possible. She isn’t interested in maintaining a relationship with you. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you can move on with your life.

    You need to let this go and I would strong suggest looking into talking with someone (a therapist or counselor) to help you work through these feelings.

17. You don’t.

18. Happened to me with a girl I really liked a lot. First time she ghosted me for couple months, then again texted me. The fool in me thought everything is back to normal, started talking again for months, met irl, things were going good, until it didn’t. She ghosted me again once she went back to college and it annoyed tf out of me. She suddenly stopped being attractive and I didnt text her since and moved on. Feeling much much better now. So my advice would be to not reach out, let the person go on with their life and OP should too.
    PS: She texted me one year later after her college was over and guess whose chance was it to ghost?

19. You don’t

20. Don’t. They don’t care about you. Just don’t. I’m serious.

21. cut her loose its only a matter of time till she ghosts you again. Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me type situation.

    Edit: dont be a dick if she reaches out to you, just dont waste the mental energy reaching out to her.

22. If someone ghosts you you should leave them alone until such time s they contact you.

23. You don’t Imo , if somebody ghosts me then I have enough self respect to let the dead Rest In Peace 🤷🏾‍♂️

24. don’t. clearly that person doesn’t value or respect you and a little time won’t change that

25. Username checks out

26. You need to explore why someone backing away makes you want to chase. This is likely a trigger for you that comes from childhood. Is there a parent who was less response to you? Did you feel that you needed to jump through hoops to get their attention? Explore this because the “healthy” response in this situation is to let go and move on.

    Her ghosting signals that she doesn’t want to engage with you. It also signals that she doesn’t know how to communicate directly and in a healthy manner. This isn’t something that you can change. Your job is to accept the loss and process it, learn whatever lesson you need to from this situation, and then move on.