What is that point in your life that you look to as your “before” and “after”? Are you in a better or worse position now for it?

17 comments

1. Up until about 2012 I thought I was a free man. Then I woke up and realized that I was just a pissant all along…..r/pissant

2. Immigration to my new country. Better, of course.

3. My final semester in grad school in 2016. I had never worked so hard in school before. From being a flat broke student who survived on ramen noodles, to having $80,000 in the bank in savings today, I’d say I’m much better off.

4. I am more of a now and then person, I guess

5. Leaving my home country.

   Much better now.

6. You’ll have more than one of these events if you live long enough.

7. I have two. When I got married and when I got divorced 10 years later.

8. Before and after moving cross-country when I was like 10-11, and before and after becoming a widower at 37.

9. Before and after a shitty long term relationship. In a much better position now.

10. I have 2. Leaving my abusive mother’s house in the middle of the night 3 days before Halloween 6 years ago, and May 1st, 2019 when I finally got off the last of the medications she had me put on before I turned 18. I’m now married and have a job that allows me to do more than just pay bills and survive, so I’m in a 100% better position because of them.

11. Hmm, when I finished grad school.

    I went from tedious lab rat to education analytics guy. Doing much better and feel good about the work I do as well.

12. When I joined college. I would say I am in not good position now not worse

13. My divorce. So much better off now.

14. I have like a dozen of these points lol. Right now, I’m in the middle, not better or worse than before, but I could be doing much better.

    The first one is the day my sister was born, the next one is the day my parents told me they were divorcing when I was 12, then next one is when my dad gained full custody of me from my abusive narcissistic mother, the next one was junior year of high school when I finally broke out of my shell, the next one was moving into my abusive moms house and trying to start over with her… which failed, so the next one was me moving out of her house when I was 21 and never speaking to her again. I can go on, there’s a few more, but you get the idea.

15. I have two really.

    The first was when I started dating my high school girlfriend. I was a dweeb to put it lightly, with little to no friends, and she was the stereotypical high school cheer captain. We exchanged numbers one day for some reason (maybe a group project, I don’t remember) and started talking. She thought I was funny and we started hanging out. Eventually we started ‘dating’ and it changed my life. My confidence went through the roof, I was suddenly popular by proxy, and felt like I was a king. It sounds stupid and corny, but for a 17 year old ‘loser’ it was life changing.

    The second was when I got arrested for drinking a few years later. My college was in a tiny southern town and they threw the book at underage drinkers. Got arrested and was given 18 months of probation. At the time, I was about to flunk out of school as well. I quit drinking, cut some folks out of my life, and just focused on school. Ended up getting my masters degree and love my career (well as much as someone can).

16. ‘Before’ when I was at school, still a kid, no job -> ‘after’ having turned 18, completed exams, left school and got a job. I am in a worse position I would have to say, life just felt better in childhood when there were no responsibilities and I lived my life to spend time with my friends. Now I feel like work takes up all my time, and the rest of my time is just spent waiting to go back to work. That being said, I’m still doing okay and I’m sure there will be many other before and after stages in my life, like when I go off to uni next year.

17. Getting sober was my turning point. Been clean for a couple years now and life (while obviously having speed bumps) has been a steady uphill journey