What is something your partner has done while going down on you that made you think “wow, I could add this to a book called ‘100 ways not to go down on someone’”?

33 comments

  1. Honestly just not being open to what I’m asking and thinking he knows exactly what he’s doing. Like… if I’m telling you I like x y and x and you think you know better and do a b and c… I don’t like that.

  3. Lol

    Sticking a tongue inside, kinda mimicking the penis. Absolutely pointless and embarrassingly weird.

  4. I was in 69 and my ex literally farted in my face. She found it hilarious 🤮🤮🤮

  6. My ex tugged on my hair there (it was short, like not even a week after shaving) and made demeaning comments about it and suggested I actually clean myself up next time, then looked extremely surprised I didn’t want to continue things

  7. Motor boating or chin rubbing up and down does nothing. Actually it does negatively to the experience.

  9. If he’s got a beard, there’s a right and a wrong way to use it. Christ, my ex would leave me feeling like I dragged myself across the carpet like a dog, and it was just.. fucking OUCH. I actually hated receiving oral for the longest time because of that. Thank goodness my husband knows what he’s doing.

    Seriously though, any dude that doesn’t actively take the time to gauge whether or not you seem to be enjoying something and just does what he thinks oughta feel nice is prob just gonna leave you contemplating the merits of swearing off the whole damn idea for good. And if you’ve never had a dude treat you right in that department and are unsure of what to even ask for.. I recommend having a woman show you what you’re missing. Takes one to know one, y’know?

  11. He fell asleep while he was going down on me once. Still haven’t recovered emotionally from that one 🥲

  12. Not relaxing their tongue and it was painful cuz it was so stiff.
    I might as well had grabbed a stick out of the yard…it would’ve felt the same

  13. Not finding the clit, thinking another area is the clit, lapping up the entire area and never doing it right…..

  15. He bit my nipple!!! Hard! It was sore for days. And that’s only one of the reasons why that guys an Ex.

  16. My ex liked to give oral for like 3 minutes and then either try to jump right into PIV or, more often, would roll over and go “my turn!”

    He wanted full on BJs, btw. Porn level gagging and slurping and to completion. I guess he thought 3 minutes earned him that.

    I stopped wanting oral from him due to the transactional nature and then stopped bothering with sex as well. I wonder if he’s stopped being a selfish worthless lover since then. It took my years to break free from the negative association I had with oral, both giving and receiving.

  17. Intensely staring up at me to watch my reaction, very uncomfortable.

    Also reaching up and choking without prior discussion.

  18. My ex would get SO UPSET if I didn’t finish within an ‘appropriate’ time limit. I still get self conscious about how long it takes me because of him

  19. spent quite a while just licking my vulva. thought he was just teasing until he came up and asked if i was close yet. in retrospect, probably shouldn’t have expected much from him because he couldn’t find my clit despite trying very hard for weeks

  20. He paused and started laughing out loud. (He immediately apologized and said he just thought of something he and I had been laughing about earlier, but still. Keep your head in the game!)

  21. Licking the clit like if he’s desperate to see me cum. Nice and slow is the right way to go for me.

  24. Licking it super slow like he is casually licking an ice cream cone. Stop. I’ll do it myself.

  25. It’s not really the “worst” but I think a guy who doesn’t make use of his hands/fingers at the same time is really missing out. You can easily bring it to a next level orgasm with oral + manual simulation.

  26. Speeding up and moving his tongue side to side despite my numerous talks of telling him going fast does *not* work. And the side to side thing on my clit is just perplexing.

    Other than that, our sex life is amazing. It’s just these two things.

    Well, moaning. I wish men were taught it’s okay to moan. Why are they all so quiet?!

  27. Look self conscious, I stopped him pretty quick cos he didn’t seem like he enjoyed it

  28. made it transactional and low effort. he would give me 3 minutes or less of outer labia-licking (even after I would move him to my clit or tell him “that didn’t feel good, try here”), then stop and immediately try to do piv. it didn’t feel good and when I asked him about it, if he didn’t like giving oral, he said he loves it and loves doing it… meanwhile he’s never gone down on me since (and has said no the one time I asked). I just stopped asking because I hated it and felt ashamed because he either didn’t seem to care about my pleasure or didn’t care enough to listen to me and my body.

  29. He kept humming into my nether regions like he was trying to play a kazoo. At one point I finally just snapped and said, “IT’S NOT A KAZOO, HONEY,” and he looked so confused. “That doesn’t feel good?” NO, kind of like I’ve told you the few other times you’ve tried it?

    He was remarkably good and enthusiastic otherwise (which pisses me off, given that he cheated on me, why must I associate that pleasure with his dumb ass), so I truly do not understand. But it does make me laugh now. Sort of.

  30. Asked why it was taking so long. After about 5 minutes. Then sighing loudly. I stopped letting him go down on me at all after that. He’s a great man but gives off harsh “waiting for a late bus and I have places to be” vibes.

  32. Rhythmically rubbing his tongue and fingers over the opening to my urethra repeatedly, and then arguing with me that “women like this” when I asked him to stop because it doesn’t do anything for me and is a good way to get a UTI.

    Just a suggestion but is someone tells you they’re not enjoying something, don’t tell them that they’re wrong. Trust that a person knows their own body and the things they find pleasurable way better than you do.

  33. He licked me for a few minutes, stopped, and tried to rip out an ingrown hair from my privates. Like straight up pinching and scratching my skin. He wondered why I wasn’t in the mood anymore

Leave a Reply
You May Also Like