Hey everyone. I would like to ask you all for advice. I’ve met this girl through tinder and we hit it of quite well. She was really chatty and she could spend days talking to me. We’ve finally met last week and well got a little drunk and slept with eachother. It all went well and we’ve had a nice time together. However since then she’s very different. She’s almost doesn’t reply and stuff. It’s quite a change from what I’m used to from her. I know she hasn’t been feeling too well lately and I know she has tendencies to stay quiet during such times but it’s really weird. It’s been more than a week and I don’t know what to think about it. I like her and I would obviously like to see her again but I don’t want to make a fool of myself. I don’t know what to think of her behaviour, any ideas?
Thank you all 🙂
8 comments
Rough spot OP. I’d recommend just giving her a few days of space and then ease back into conversation if she seems down for it. It could be she just needs time to process her thoughts and feelings or she just wants to be alone for unrelated reasons. Also just cause you had a nice time doesn’t mean she did. Best of luck OP I hope it works out for you!
Who had orgasms?
Alright, a woman I’ll give my two cents. My suggestion, make your presence know without being in her face, like give her time to herself but make sure you you send a ” hey there, hope your day’s a good one!” Let’s us know your there without smuthering
She probably wanted to get laid. Then got laid. The end
Give her space but still make your presence known like don’t smother her. And after a few days if she’s still not receptive i suggest you talk about it with her. And if you still hit a wall after that then it’s time to go X
Im going to give you a lil insight into how my brain has worked in the past that may or may not be true for this girl, but will always be helpful to keep in mind.
One time I pulled exactly this shit on a guy. We had a great connection and the date went really well. He convinced me it was a good idea to drop me home. I mentally said ‘okay, but he won’t be allowed inside’. Got to mine and we kissed, he asked to use the bathroom and in my mind I was like ‘uh alright, but then boys gotta go’. Instead he invites himself on a tour after, i oblige and think, okay but not the bedroom. I think you get the idea and we end up sleeping together. From his point of view, I am a willing participant and everything has been great. From my point of view, I’ve busted through about 9 different boundaries and can’t believe I let this happen. I’m ashamed and don’t want to face the guilt again, so I fade away from him.
It happened a few times in my teens and early, early 20s, though there has just been other times where I’ve liked someone better, or I wasn’t wowed or whatever. Regardless, it often isn’t you
Maybe she thought you would not respect her now that she slept with you (imo, too fast but that’s me) or think that she came across as easy. Also, this may sound like it’s coming from out of left field, but being you mentioned she has a tendency to get quiet at times, she may be depressed a bit? Why wasn’t she feeling well?
I get horny one week per month. During that period I might get interested in men. After that wears off i am like “heh whatever I have other stuff to do”. Half of the time I don’t even know what I was thinking. Once I got obsessed about a dude with 23 and a deadend job just because he was 2m tall. Sometimes I wish they did brain transplants.
Anyway without knowing this woman we can’t tell. Maybe she used you for sex, maybe she is busy, maybe she is embarassed, maybe she is no longer hormonal, maybe she is bipolar and on her low phase who knows.