Due to him making me uncomfortable earlier in the relationship, I made it clear that I wanted him to ask before he initiated anything physical or sexual. He didn’t follow this boundary multiple times.
For example, we were making out after I set this boundary and then he slapped me (lightly) in the face as a sexual thing without asking. When I talked to him about this, he said that he was “just in the mood/it was the heat of the moment” or something similar.
We also did consensual spanking where I had asked him to spank me while I was bent over, but then he began humping me a little over clothes/rubbing his dick against my ass without asking. He sheepishly said “okay, I’m sorry” after I confronted him about it. This was also after I set the boundary about him having to ask before doing anything sexual.
Do these things count as sexual assault? He always stopped when I said “no” or “stop” in the moment, but in this case, I had already told him to ask me verbally for consent prior to doing sexual things, which would definitely include slapping my face as a kink and humping me. He also did other things without asking, like grabbing my ass.
5 comments
By definition yes.
Only you can answer that. We weren’t there and everyone has different boundaries. If you feel violated then please don’t see him again.
I would be pretty afraid to live in a relationship where my girlfriend may think it’s sexual assault if i grab her ass without ask. I think it’s up to you to find a man with your same point of view about relationships, but i doubt that your boyfriend behaviour can be considered sexual assault.
Lose him. It will never end.
Slapping in the face is definitely something that needs to be talked about prior. Grabbing and humping an ass… not so much by most people’s standards. BUT only your opinion matters and you should do what makes you comfortable.
Answering your question, I wouldn’t consider any of that sexual assault, no. Just not compatible.