Hey my names Sky, I’m a 20 year old guy and when it comes to girls I might actually be the most insecure person on earth (even though I’m not bad looking at all, at contrary even, i’ve gotten quite alot of girls who asked me out but I said no because I was actually too scared). A while ago I asked on some subreddit how to overcome this insecure feeling and get me to talk to girls because I do go out alot but I’m just not the talking type. But last week I (thanks to my friend) met the most beautiful and friendly girl (bright blue eyes brown hair etc), she literally couldn’t be more perfect and we had sex on the first night we met. I really loved it but I couldn’t keep my dick hard because I was stressing soooo hard, we had wonderful foreplay though, we both really loved it and she came atleast 3 times but I just can’t get to it, which really tanked my confidence levels even more below what it already was. She thinks it’s her fault but it really isn’t, it’s my dumb ass who can’t get a grip on himself and I fear this might ruin our relationship in the future… Since this happened I can’t even masturbate on my own anymore, I just got this feeling in my stumach as if I’m shivering from the cold, even 3 days after all this. She doesn’t really live close to me (1 hour train drive) and even though everything happened like it did, she wanted to meet again when I asked her next weekend (and the week after too). I don’t have low sexdrive at all, I used to masturbate atleast once a day for the past 5 years and I can ejaculate 5 times a day If I really want to, it was becoming more of a time thing then a capability thing. But not anymore, it’s just a mentality thing I can’t get over, I was hoping I am not the only one in this situation and maybe someone who overcame this could give some tips because I’m already stressing in advance and I just know it will go exactly like last time :(…
1 comment
The most important thing to do is to lower your expectations. I know this seems like “woo woo” nonsense advice, but it’s true.
Why do you have to have an eight-inch cock, that can last 2 hours, and ejaculate a gallon-sized cum shot? There’s no reason that you have to be a sex god.
[Women love sex.](https://366sexhacks.wordpress.com/2022/08/16/take-me/) It’s a fact.
And you can bet that if you’re in a relationship, she loves having sex with you, because of your intimate bond. She doesn’t really care how good (or bad) the sex is. She’s happy to be there with you.
Also when you worry about something (anything, really), it’s probably because you don’t have much experience doing said activity.
A common example is public speaking. Everyone fears public speaking because it’s a scary thing to do…and we never do it.
To become a better public speaker, you practice public speaking.
To become a better lover…have more sex!
I don’t know how much experience you have, but whether you’re young or old…[having more sex will improve your sexual confidence](https://366sexhacks.wordpress.com/2022/08/14/alpha/).
Especially if you’re in a new relationship, having sex might seem like a weird thing to do. It takes getting used to. This is a new person, and you want to make sure they like you.
So…have more sex! When you have more sex, [you’ll learn what turns her on](https://366sexhacks.wordpress.com/2022/08/10/crack/), what makes her wet, and [what makes her scream in pleasure](https://366sexhacks.wordpress.com/2022/08/15/own/).
That’s how you get rid of sexual anxiety.
Lastly yes I can see it! If you think you have a problem with erections, then [in the foreplay](https://366sexhacks.wordpress.com/2022/08/09/foreplay/) you are worrying about whether you’re going to get an erection. You are touching your partner with your mind on your penis; thinking ‘is it hard’, ‘when will it be hard’, ‘why isn’t it hard?’
Worrying about your penis is not sexy and nobody can get aroused under pressure. ‘ED’ becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I suggest during foreplay to take your mind if not actions completely from your penis and focus on pleasing her like [eating her pussy like a savage](https://366sexhacks.wordpress.com/2022/08/03/cunnilingus/)
Remember penetration is usually the end of sex, not the beginning, and your partner does not get aroused just from penile penetration.