I feel like when your partner doesn’t trust you, it causes unnecessary drama. People become toxic. The relationship can become abusive

9 comments

  1. relationships without trust is hard, trust can be broken and it can break a marriage but trust can also be earned again but its not easy and comes at a cost but if you are both willing to put in the work to heal it can be better than before.

  3. If there’s no trust on either side, it won’t work. I would not be in a relationship without 100% trust on both sides.

  5. I could not be with someone who didn’t trust me (especially when I’ve given them no reason not to) because I could not deal with the controlling, possessive, and insecure behaviors that usually come out of a lack of trust. I’m not handing over every bit of my privacy for someone who has unprovoked distrust in me. I would find that emotionally exhausting and basically a waste of my time. If it was from previous relationship trauma I would honestly need a person to have worked through that (maybe in therapy) before I’d be interested in dating them.

    It would be a different story if I’d done something to them to warrant it and we were trying to build back trust, but I don’t have firsthand experience with that since I haven’t done anything trust breaking in a relationship before.

    I want the trust I’m willing to give. So it’s not like I’m controlling or insecure over my partner either.

  6. It only causes drama if you let it. Placating the insecure person’s jealousy becomes a game. They need constant reinforcement, create some drama, and then you waste time soothing their “fears” and things stay ok for a while……

    Until next time.

    Best to pull the weed out by the roots otherwise it just grows right back. Lather, rinse, and repeat. Tell your partner that you had quite enough of this happy crappy, that you’re no longer interested in blowing sunshine up their ass on a regular basis, and if they don’t get help, you will leave. And then the next time it happens and they haven’t started counseling, leave for a few days.

  7. Going thru a divorce now due to this exact issue. “Tom” asked hubs if I could dance with him, hubs said yes. I’ve known “Tom” years long before I ever met hubby. Apparently I danced to close to “Tom”. Another instance, same guy “Tom”, at another event, apparently I “hunted” down “Tom” to give him a hug. “Tom” is a life long friend of mine and my families. Same night I hunted him down some random guy that is also friends of my families was at this same event, walked over to where hubs was and said “she only puts out on Wednesdays”.

    I was no where near them so I honestly have no idea what was said beforehand, I was talking and dancing with a few female friends and I looked over towards my hubby and he motioned for me to come over and proceeded to tell me, I don’t know if I should go after him or go after you! Hubby walked off, I sat down and started crying. Mind you, I don’t know this guy, I’ve never talked to this guy before. I have seen him only a couple of times with my family members.

    It hasn’t been just “Tom” over the years, it has been several men he has questioned me about, from co-workers to the neighbor down the road. I have NEVER cheated, and I’ve never given him any inclination that I would. I don’t flirt with other men. I don’t hide my phone, I don’t talk to other men etc. Hubs was cheated on in his past relationships and I guess, just expects me to do the same. He is insecure and has severe trust issues I can no longer deal with!

  8. Trust is vital. To me, along with respect, it is as important as love. I truly think those are the three must haves in a relationship.

  9. People do become toxic, but there is help out there even for past traumas. I learned this the hard way. I was that unsecured and jealous person.. with the right amount of alcohol I was abusive once so now we’re probably heading to divorce..

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