It’s become obvious to me now that even though I have people in my life I’m still alone. When I go through something I go through it nobody else even if I beg for help.
I never wanted to accept that reality but my girlfriend told me no one will save me and I have to save myself and show others I’m worth it to get any kind of support or attention.
I’m tired of being let down at this point reaching out to anyone just hurts because no one is truly there for me. Not even her. So what do I do? How do I accept I’m pretty much alone for the rest of my life and cope with that? I’m at the part where I realize what everyone’s been telling me. Where do I go from here?
10 comments
Honestly this is my default and I have no idea how to live any other way.
Even in relationships I still maintain a significant amount of independence.
You need to stop relying and depending on others to help you through life and learn how to be independent and self reliant. When you achieve that and have your shit together you’ll find other people will want to jump on board that train.
Get your own place, focus on your own career and hobbies, deal with your own problems and learn from them. Have a purpose in life beyond just wanting to cling to other people. There is no magic trick here, you just have to get out and do it. No one can fix your life for you.
You’re not on your own, trust me. There will be someone there for you and if those in your life say that they won’t be, then they ain’t shit.
Just because you are a man doesn’t mean you don’t deserve the love and care you need as a human. I hope you find someone to help you because you should always have a person to lean on.
My friend, pick up a copy of Meditations by Marcus Aurelius.
I promise you, you’ll realize how strong and awesome of person you are.
I’ve got a mirror full of sticky notes of motivational quotes and quotes to help me refocus. I pretty much suffocate my emotions through reasoning and meditation. If I can’t come up with a clear reason for my issues, I dismiss them and move on.
It takes time to be able to dismiss things that really hurt or affect us in a big way.
I’m not sure what your girlfriend’s intention was when she said that to you but it sounds like she’s toxic. You don’t always have to compete with someone to get attentions or supports. Maybe your girlfriend only supports or gives her attentions only when she thinks it’s worth it. But I’m sure a lot of people, at least including me, would just help or support anyone who seems to be at their predicament because we’d rather want to see someone’s being happy than being in pain. Well, however, as an independent person who can be just fine with living alone without any friends, being alone is not so bad or terrible. I’m so happy and busy enough being alone with my adorable dog.
Stack cash and keep on pushing. No one is gunna do it for you. Best advice I got was about a year ago at 40 was your only going to be as good as your five closest friends. The second best advice I got was in my early twenties and that was when someone asks you for a favor your the one getting fucked wish you well on this journey it gets better
Take care of yourself. Cry when you need to. No one likes crying but it’s a healthy release of emotions. Do some chores tonight so you can relax tomorrow after work. Try thinking nice things about yourself more often.
Therapy bro, therapy is your best freind. Aside from that I’d break up with your girlfreind cause that’s just gonna make you feel like shit if you can’t be open with her. Get a journal, and find characters whom ideals you want to emulate and who’ve gone through similar problems.
Just as you use a mirror to see dirt or pimples on your face, you need people in your life to serve as a mirror for your soul. If I were single and living alone again, I would make certain to build a network and join a community of people who can provide feedback on me, and help to develop my many facets of life (obviously, it’s mutual).
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vOj5KLcymgA