If you’re in a satisfyung casualish relationship, how did you go about finding your partner and establishing those communications, boundaries, and expectations?
I’ve connected with several men on a genuine level, but yeesh. I’m going through a divorce, so my independence is super important to me and I’m not in a place to attach deeply to anyone. BUT I really enjoy connection and physical relationship. Maybe I’m just not being very patient, but I’m communicating my best with everyone, and so far either they end up being fuckboys or wanting a long term relationship. My local culture is also very much extreme, everyone either wants to hook up or find a spouse. I also think that being a woman who knows exactly what I want may be a little intimidating for a lot of men 😅
6 comments
*SATISFYING
I’m a bit lost. What exactly are you looking for?
I’d just write in your dating bio exactly what you are looking for.
It’s possible. For me I just like making friends
It’s not knowing exactly what you want that’s intimidating for men. It’s that what you want is for someone to invest time and energy in you but also not. The vast majority of those people are either going to invest significant time into because they actually like you and want something more or not invest significant time into you because they don’t genuinely like you and will never want anything other than the occasional hook up when they feel like it. Aka either people looking for a relationship or fuckboys. It’s not your culture that’s the problem. It’s just the reality of the situation when you’re essentially looking for someone who cares but doesn’t care.
I don’t know how you’d identify these types of men but I’d say look for recently divorced men.
I’d say chances are recently divorced men want regular companionship and sex but don’t have the emotional bandwidth to be in a serious relationship. And don’t want to have to spend so much time looking for it.
I had a handful of these types of FWB relationships after my divorce. I always put “casual only” in my bio.