He’s my daughter’s dad ( 26M) but we haven’t been together as a couple for over three years.
He has said that he loves me and that he wants to try again but I (22F) feel like I’ve moved on from that time of us.
Sometimes when he is here, I ask him to stay over. It’s more of a need than anything else.
We’ve both been straight about our feelings so I never felt like I was leading him on, but I was thinking earlier that what if I am? I may be over thinking it, but I don’t want to be manipulating him without realising.
TL; DR We used to date (a 2yr relationship). He has said that he still has feelings for me but I don’t feel that way about him anymore.
We do still sleep together ( instigated by me) but I’m worried it may be leading him on, or that it will eventually
4 comments
This sounds more like something for him to figure out, but if you don’t feel good about it, I’d stop.
Your daughter is best served by having parent who can get along and have clear boundaries.
Yes, he’s be foolish for continuing to chase after a woman who doesn’t want him except for sex. If he was anyone else, you could let him make that mistake.
But because he’s your kids dad, he can’t just leave. He can’t go contact. You have to protect him from himself here and stop leading him on. It doesn’t matter whether you mean to or not, that’s what having sex with him does.
You need a new fwb.
It’s not a need, you want to have sex with him. And yes I think it’s wrong because you know he still has feelings for you. This will blow up in your face when you find someone else to date and have to cut him off.
Yes it’s harmful. Harmful to him and your daughter. Unless she’s an infant or young toddler, she knows when he stays.
Don’t fall into the cliche of separated parents who sometimes kinda play house.
Get yourself a toy or something but don’t use him and blur boundaries.