So my girlfriend (23) and i (23)started dating about 5 months ago. Everything has been perfect. It’s always felt like she’s the one for me. she is perfect in every way, all the things seem to align. But I recently went out for a trip with her friends and a few of them were teasing her with another guy in the group who she had a FWB with. I was her first so I know it wasn’t that intense. I knew about it since before but I trust her and i know she would never cheat on me ever. But the guy who they teased her with also made some comments and called her a good kisser in front of me. She did nothing but smirk. She was distant with me throughout the trip and seemed a bit off. She would constantly be around the guy as if there is no past between them. I didn’t say anything on the trip or to the guy even though he mocked our relationship multiple times because I felt like she wouldn’t have my back. This was new to me because she’s like my solid rock and she’s never in 8 months given me a reason to feel like she isn’t on my side. I asked her about what happened and calmly brought it up. She said that she didn’t notice anything but then after I told her how I felt she broke down because she felt horrible about her actions. But I asked her about what happened between the guy and her and she just said that it was at a weak point in her life and there was nothing serious. But I don’t believe it because I’ve heard her say that the reason they didn’t date is because he didn’t want to commit to her. She kept telling me that he’s a nobody to her but i could see that it wasn’t the case. She kept complimenting him like she does with others but it felt weird because she acts as if nothing happened.
She also said that she didn’t hear the comments he made about our relationship and she didn’t notice anything. But she’s a therapist so i know she is perceptive as fuck and not stupid at all.
It’s a bit weird that this is happening so I don’t know what to do. She chose to go back and forth in his car on the trip and he kept playing the playlist that she likes in particular.
They are in the same friend group so they keep meeting often. but even then I feel like she has an ego so she didn’t pursue that guy but with me it came easy so she’s with me.
How do I make sense of this? Because she keeps denying when i ask her if there was anything serious that went on between them.
I don’t want to be the guy who asks her to cut off from someone and i also don’t want to be the fool who is a rebound guy.
I also know for a fact that she loves me a lot. To the point that she still cares after months whether I’m okay with whatever happened. But I can’t shake the idea that this happened in the first place. Everyone keeps telling me to move on from something that happened so long ago but I can’t get over the fact that she was being more cordial with him and let his comments slide.
4 comments
Bro bro bro.
I’d be you i’d be gone. She hasnt moved on from him clearly and has lingering feelings, be it consciously or not.
However the main problem is the Guy. Mocked your relationship, still pleases her with music etc.. and gang out with her? The moment he’ll want to commit to her she’ll Come running to his feet.
You decide. Leave her and dont get hurt, or stay and you’ll eventually be fucked. You Can tell her that you dont want her to meet him but it’ll either backfire at you and she’ll only fall more for the Fucker, or she’ll listen to you but you’ll pass as “controlling, toxic” that kinda shit.
You’re only 23 so ima cut you some slack. But my brother know this, don’t ever assume a partner won’t cheat on you lol. You need to take the rose colored glasses off. Save this comment since I get the feeling you won’t actually take any of this advice. It happens when we are young and don’t know any better. Nothing good comes from you’re girl being close with guys she use to bang.
She acting single, let her be single bro
Ok so. U need to let her know u no longer are ok with her hanging out with previous partners/bfs/bootycall/ guys she messed with. If she isn’t ok with that then end it.