I am 21 F, and I struggle with dating. To add some context, I attend a military academy that is considered to be prestigious. I go home about 1.5 months per year, but that is split between two leaves, Christmas and Summer.
I choose not to date anyone at the academy because I do not want to date military. Also, I want to date someone who is from my hometown.
Since I live in the South, most (at least the ones I’ve run into) are intimidated by me being in the military. On top of that, I have what I consider to be ‘high’ standards. I want someone who is older and is living their life (I am fine with someone my age, but they need to have a plan for their life). I want someone who is smart, and I can have an intelligent conversation with. I want someone who doesn’t believe in the “gender roles” of the household (like men do the outside work and women do the inside duties). I don’t want kids, which I tell every guy right off the bat! I want someone who is not intimidated by the fact I could be making more money than them(not a for sure, but a lot of guys hate this😅). One thing I dont find as equally important is looks. I workout everyday, and I expect my partner to do the same. I personally would like someone who is over 6ft, but not a dealbreaker. I know I lean towards the brown hair, brown eyes look, but again, not a deal breaker. I hate facial hair and long hair 🙃.
The most important thing is that they have to be open with long distance. I hate long distance, but it’s inevitable for me. I wont be able to see my family except for twice a year, my significant other is no exception to that.
After every guy I have learned to know, not one has met my standard. At this point, I no longer ever feel a spark of a possible new crush or that butterflies in my stomach when meeting an attractive man. Its just gone. Right now, all I really care about is myself. I workout, do homework, and attend to my school duties.
Im not complaining or asking for pity, it just sucks. And i want to know if anyone is going through something similar. I was to know how to get that attachment back.
3 comments
You want to date someone that you’ll see twice a year? What’s the point?
youve decided to date a fraction of a percent of all the men available, every little specification cuts down a piece of the pie available and makes it harder for you to find someone. you forgot to mention dick size btw, over or under 6 inches?
I think the time of long distance matters- if you find anyone who’s willing to do long distance. You’re only 21- many 21 year olds are still in school and trying to live their best lives, so attending different schools, which means distance, can sometimes be a given. I know it was for me. However, the whole long distance idea begins to dwindle down when you’re older and serious about maintaining a long term relationship. If you’re looking for someone older, they’re likely not willing to do long distance. It’s probably better to finish the military academy stuff before looking for a serious relationship. When do you plan on being done?