So I (24M) recently broke up with my girlfriend (20F). We lasted for 10 months which is my longest relationship.
I’ve been in around 8 relationships prior with some of them serious yet it always seems to end around the 6-9 months mark.
I realize if it ends up multiple times, there must be something wrong with me too but I’m not sure how.
I’ve never cheated or even flirted with others to make any of my girlfriend jealous. I’m usually nice (not too much to be a pushover which I can understand can become a turn off)
I’m decent in bed (??) Or atleast that’s what my girlfriends tell me even after we’ve broken up.
The one trajectory which I find common with all ny relationship are that I sometimes give too much love. I won’t go mad with constant talks or calls but on the rare occasions where we have major fights, I sometimes go anxious with overthinking and end up calling my girlfriend multiple times. And them not picking up, increases my anxiety making me call even more.
Every relationship ending makes me feel that I need to restrain myself with the amount of love I show, or give healthy space.
You might say I shouldn’t change myself for any other girl but when the relationship trajectory becomes same for every relationship, somewhere I realize I need to change it.
I’m very cool and chill when I’m single or even at the initial stages of relationship. It’s when things get super serious, the clinginess starts coming.
Am I doomed to never have a long lasting relationship? What can I do to improve it?
P.s I work on myself and self love. I read, workout, have a successful job and got lots of friends. So it’s not like I don’t have a life outside relationship.
tl;dr:- No relationship of mine lasts more than 9 months. Am I doomed for relationships?
5 comments
>tl;dr:- No relationship of mine lasts more than 9 months. Am I doomed for relationships?
>So I (24M) recently broke up with my girlfriend (20F). We lasted for 10 months which is my longest relationship.
You’re not doomed, but the nature of dating with young women is that if you aren’t top dog in looks and salary, they’re going to think they can keep climbing the ladder higher tier men.
It’s just how it is.
Now when you get older, and possibly into the older dating bracket of women they will totally thrive off of this. 🤷‍♀️
Yeah your doomed bro. Just give up. Or buy a mail order bride.
not doomed. there’s these phases to relationships. the honeymoon phase, the commitment phase…i don’t remember the rest, but you should look them up. but it’s not uncommon for relationships to fall apart in the first year bc the honeymoon phase ends and you start actually seeing the other person. then it’s up to both if they wanna commit or break up essentially.
How much time do you invest with getting to know the person before being in a committed relationship with them? Hate to sound cliche but the best partners are best friends first and foremost, and the foundation of friendship takes time to build
>we have major fights
The only thing I can see here is that you shouldn’t really be having major fights especially early on in a relationship. You calling your GF multiple times and them not picking up is not the reason why they are dropping you. The reason why they are dropping you is because they are unhappy, likely because you are having major fights. You need to work on that. You have heard the phrase, “Happy wife, happy life?” Most things in life aren’t worth fighting about. Just let it go and make your GF happy.