Just wanted to hear some outside views on this.
I (20F) went on a 1st date with a guy (21M) that I met on Tinder. His height was listed as 5’10, but when we met in person he was barely any taller than me, for reference I’m 5’7.
Didn’t matter to me so I didn’t mention it and we continued our date. But thinking back not sure if I should be more concerned since it might be a bigger red flag than I think lying off the start.
29 comments
Well this risk is at stake for the whole game. Either you could ask why did he lied on the first place and get an explanation or keep moving as it is.
Height is a huge insecurity for guys. It’s not good to lie like that but I don’t consider what he did a red flag. But I can tell it’s something he doesn’t like people knowing
They should figure out a way to verify everyone’s exact height and weight and have it required to be shown on their bio. Would solve a lot of first date surprises 👌
I don’t like lying it is red flag for me, maybe not for others. If he lies about simple stuff he will lie about other things, also, this shows how insecure he is about himself which is another turn off.
dudes probably gotten a lot of savage comments from women been 5 7ft ish so i think women need to be kinder to men on height stuff imo so he just lies about it.
That said i think all this height hangup stuff appears to be an American thing since i have never come across it here. im 5 9 but im not really insecure about my height since i know what i have to offer so i let everything else do the speaking not my height, if someone has height issues that insecurity is on them really, idc about it.
Why are people saying “give him a break he is probably insecure about his height”..When does that excuse lying? What is the point of lying when you’re gonna meet up and they are gonna see he is not the height he claimed to be?
It’s tinder, he doesn’t have to put his height on his bio.
Reddit will tell you to ditch anyone who lies on their profile except for a man’s height. You’re asking the wrong place, this is a haven for insecurity.
Ya fuck that. If you’re insecure about your height don’t list it. I hate petty little lies so I’d not date him. There’s plenty of guys who aren’t insecure and have to lie about their height.
And I’m sure guys that lie about height and the reason the girls deny moving forward with dating will blame it on their height not the fact they lied
Huge it means they will lie over any minor inconvenience
“How much of a red flag is it a guy lying from a dating app?”
“His height was listed as 5’10, but when we met in person he was barely any taller than me..”
“Didn’t matter to me so I didn’t mention it and we continued our date.”
Each of us has our own mate selection screening process and *must haves list*.
Each of us has our own boundaries, “red flags”, and “deal breakers”.
Some people call “white lies” on dating profiles “kitten fishing” (misrepresenting their height, age, wearing hats to cover up baldness, being overweight and listing themselves as average weight…)
Essentially their goal is to increase their number of opportunities to meet someone. *It’s competitive*.
Their hope is once you meet them their personality and other traits will cause you to overlook the “white lie”. Unless the item is a “must have” list thing it’s usually not considered a “red flag”
People do similar things with job resumes they send out to potential employers.
Everyone is trying to *get in the door*. My guess is this guy believes *his height* is blocking his opportunities. If his height isn’t important to *you,* I wouldn’t see it as being a “red flag”.
Best wishes!
Were you wearing heels? If you’re closer to 5’7 and a half but round down and he’s closer to 5’9 and a half but rounds up then that’s a two inch height difference. Even if your heels were only one inch that would make him seem “barely taller” than you. I would only consider it a lie if he was obviously 2 or more inches shorter than he said he was.
Considering how heavy the odds are against men on dating apps, it’s perfectly understandable why he would lie about his height. It’s common knowledge that 80% women on dating apps don’t typically go for anyone shorter than they are. I think it’s dumb, but that’s double standards for ya.
Give him the benefit of the doubt. First impressions aren’t everything.
I wouldn’t like it. That’s such a small thing to even lie about. You’re obviously going to get caught so why lie about it. I dated a guy whose profile said he was 26. I was 23 at the time. Well come to find out ( thanks to a nosy concerned mom) he was actually 33. If he would have just told me it wouldn’t have bothered me. But the fact he lied about his age and by 6/7 years is what bothered me. Take it as a red flag. Who knows what else he would be willing to lie about.
I think it is definitely a red flag, BUT, if you had a great time on the date and want to see him again maybe just talk to him about it. Chances are he is just very insecure about his height
I stated my height truthfully on Bumble and Hinge. I’m 5’ 7” and seem to get a decent number of matches. I’m in an older crowd so maybe that makes a difference.
I do see lots of women who don’t post a full body shot and pick angles that either are head/shoulders or mask an overweight figure. Someone that doesn’t post a full body shot on their profile is usually hiding a weight problem. But obesity is a huge problem in America, especially as we get older. That said, I hang around socially with plenty of older women who are in great shape through the athletic meetups so it can be done.
I got my weight under control 2 years ago and I’m so much healthier for it. Lost 30 pounds on keto and OMAD. I will never be taller than 5’ 7”. I’m also getting off the apps because I started dating an amazing woman.
Dudes will stand in front of you and lie about their height. It’s delusional. Definite red flag reeks of insecurity.
If you’ve ever told a lie, in any shape or form, would you want yourself completely written off?
There’s your answer
He should’ve said 5’10 in heels
This is a pretty standard lie on dating apps. I would ask for an explanation, and give it a pass unless other things are being lied about as well.
5’10 is barely taller than you and you are overthinking it. It’s literally a 3 inch difference. Almost positive he probably rounded up an inch cuz 5’10 looks better and sounds better off the tongue than 5’9. Especially when most females prefer taller men. Wish y’all would learn how to read a tape measure, it’d save this type of overthinking and it’d save the poor guy the trouble of overthinking that he might’ve done or said something wrong. Good luck
To me it is a red flag. I don’t care if you’re insecure about something, but just don’t lie about it. If someone lied about their weight, because they were insecure about it, people would also be upset. But because it’s height it’s suddenly okay?
If a guy puts 5’7” on his tinder he’s not gonna get many matches. Even 5’10” girls will saying he’s not 6’. I don’t think it’s a big deal op wasn’t mad about him being 5’7” I’d say wait it out if he lies about things all the time then that’s a different story. Lying about your height on a dating app isn’t going to destroy the foundations of what could be a relationship
Honestly red flag. The height isn’t the issue but if he’s lying about small things right off the bat then he’s definitely going to keep lying because he’s letting his insecurities get the better of him.
He will keep lying and it will slowly build up over time. Dealt with behaviour just like this and it always has a precursor or warning sign. This is it.
If he lies over something so obvious then he will lie over less obvious things
But that’s just my gut
It’s a red flag. Pretty surprised to see the comments saying to give him a chance. I guarantee if you were a guy complaining about how a woman showed up 50 pounds heavier than she represented herself in her OLD photos the same guys would be telling you not to give her a chance. Also if a guy is this insecure about his height, he will probably take it out on you if you wear heels or are confident about your body by negging you.
I met my wife on a dating app.
Idk I guess everyone is different, but I’d vote that starting off with a lie isn’t putting the best foot forward?
The fact that he lied about his height knowing that his dates will notice tells me he does it under the assumption that women wouldn’t go out with him if he was honest about his height.
Which means 1) He generalizes women as having height preferences and therefore might be misogynistic and 2) He’s comfortable lying about small things to get his way.
Both of those are red flags imo.
Not a red flag. If the app asked your weight, everyone would fudge the numbers
Dont listen to reddit. Get to know him more and be the judge. We have zero clue what this guy is like