If I hear/read ONE MORE cheating story, I will explode.
I just see so many toxic relationship stories that it has made me so, so disappointed in relationships before I even get in one. And me being a straight woman, hearing about wayward/emotionally-checked out/selfish male partners hurts even more.
Like…there are men that like their girlfriends and spouses, right? Who don’t mind doing romantic things for them? Who are sexually faithful? Right?
Please, let me know. Quickly.
TL;DR I (25F) am discouraged by the wealth of toxic relationships stories out there. Are there faithful/kind/romantic/genuine men out there?
28 comments
It’s for you to find darling..they are if you put your mind and soul into it.
Is this a real question 💀
Try r/happyrelationships.
Mmm… please tell me you’re not judging based on relationship advice subreddit alone, right?… this sub is a walking train wreck lol
Yes there are guys who cherish their partner. This is a relationship advice subreddit so no ones gonna make a post about how much they love their partner cuz they dont need advice.
Id say we are just ghosts 👀
Yes, 100% there are. My husband is the most loving, kind, loyal, intelligent human being I have ever met. I feel honoured, and honestly rather giddy whenever he talks the same way about me.
There are good men out there. Does that mean you’ll mesh well with all of them? Definitely not. Just keep in mind that no relationship is perfect just as no person is perfect. You have to communicate, both of you have to try to make things work, and remember that it’s a partnership so you don’t rule over each other. I hope you find the right one soon though. Everyone deserves happiness in their life.
Do not lose hope! My fiancee is the most kind, patient and loving person. He is also funny, intelligent and cute, I sometimes can’t believe he is real. We have so much fun together and I want to spend every living second with him. Of course we fight sometimes, but it is not over major problems and he never disrespects me. I love him soooo much!
Nah, I’m a harsh, lecherous, stoic, emotionally stunted man. But I do love my girlfriend of five years and wouldn’t trade her for any other girl in the world.
Sorry I’m not exactly what you were looking for.
For sure! Great relationships still exist! My husband and I have been married 12 years, we have two great kids and a comfortable life. We have gone through our fair share of trials but never gave up on each other. We’ve always stuck to the “don’t go to bed angry” philosophy and I feel like it’s truly helpful. We are not the most romantic pair as we’d rather sit on the couch hanging out then go out but that has never been an issue. Don’t be discouraged by these posts, it’s almost a squeaky wheel gets the grease scenario. Happy healthy relationships do exist but they take more work than some people are willing to put in. You WILL find that person who will work for a great relationship and whom you will be willing to work towards it with 😊
My parents have been married for about 25 years. My mother had shitty luck with men – one was a drug dealer, the other cheated on her with a family member (got the house though). She met my dad sometime in the early 90’s, and when on a couple of dates before he left the country to go work in France for a work season, and wouldn’t be back till after New Years. So they sent letters, or had pretty expensive phone calls and at one point my mother mentions that she wishes he was there for Christmas.
So on Christmas, he was standing at her door. He took the latest flight and got one back the next day, just took a couple sick days and promised others he’d cover their shifts.
I’ve honestly never seen any couple, fictional or real, as happy and in sync as my parents. They each know where their lines are and know where each other’s weaknesses/strengths are. Idk if it’s because they’ve been with each other so long of if they’re really soulmates. But god damn the respect they have for each other, even during the shittiest moment in their lives, that at least gives me hope. Hope this helps?
Are you single? Yeah we have an amazing relationship, wouldn’t change anything for the world. Is the world full of toxic assholes? Sure. Can you say you’ll never find love? No! It works best when you’re not looking though
Husband and I have known each other for 14 years and will be celebrating 13 years of marriage next month. He is faithful and does little romantic things for me all the time. Even after all these years we still smile goofily at each other when we come home after a long day away. Of course there have been lots of ups and downs and the downs really fucking sucked but in the end you work through them together and end up with a stronger relationship.
The internet is never the right place to judge the real world. People bitch about the troubles and keep quiet with the good stuff. Are there lots of cheaters and AH out there? Yeah, of course there is and maybe you will meet some or even date some, but then you leave and find someone better, because there are many of them.
Happy people don’t really make too many social media posts about their great relationship because they’re actually more preoccupied with the relationship than making social media posts.
Reddit, and all other sites have a strong selection bias. You don’t hear about the football players who didn’t make the cut or the entrepreneurs who got unlucky and gave up. You don’t hear about the average people living normal and happy lives, there’s just not much demand or reasons to post about it.
On a site about advice you don’t see people who don’t think they need it. There are certainly a lot of people with happy and functional relationships, and you can find them if you ask around in communities unrelated to this. Maybe it’s sort of a paradox, you’ll find way more authentic stories of people who are happy when you’re in a community that has no focus on that at all
My boyfriend and I met 5 years ago at a concert through a mutual friend. We spoke briefly, and didn’t really speak again until 5 months later when he happened to come into where I was working. I invited him out to the bar that night with me and some friends, and a couple months later we started hooking up. I ended up moving out of state, about 10 hours away. He came and saw me a couple of times and helped me move back home.
I found out from him that the night we met he was talking to a friend and mentioned meeting me. His words were “idk man there was just something about her.”
Here we are years later with a 2 year old still going strong! I definitely believe we’ve shared past lives together, it’s just such a familiar feeling 💛
There’s more to our story, but reddit only gets bare bones lol
So here’s mine, it starts out tragic but has a happy ending. Back in 2018 I very suddenly lost my boyfriend of 5 1/2 years to a freak accident, tbh the outcome was for the best because there are some injuries (in his case severe head trauma) that you just can’t come back from. Anyways, I was absolutely destroyed, but I am a strong lady and managed to pull myself up and rebuild my life. In the wake of his death one of his friends (long distance) reached out to me via Facebook. We started chatting and eventually fell hard for each other. He ended up moving almost 2,000 miles away from his hometown to build a life with me and we’re both incredibly happy. I never thought I would be able to have something so special again, but here I am. Edited to add ages, I’m 40F and he’s 50M.
You’re only going to read about the worst stuff here honestly.
My best advice: figure out what you want, date, pick the person that is right for you and once you decide to become exclusive, focus on communication.
I’m learning that communication is something many people lack and that lack of skill gets carried over into so many next relationships and just fuck shit up so badly.
I’m not saying everything will 10000% get solved, but so many issues would if everyone just expressed how they felt, what they want, and communicate with each other.
I’m 34 and my fiancé is 40 next month. We’ve been together since 2007, when I was 19 and he was 25. It’s been a fantastic journey.
He is genuinely one of the kindest, most supportive people on the planet. He pulls his weight with home chores without being asked, he brings me home a small treat if I tell him I had a bad day, he listens without judgement, and he begrudgingly laughs at my bad jokes. Honestly, he needs to give boyfriend lessons cuz some of the men you hear about out here are appalling.
I think it’s also important to remember that on subs like this, things skew negative because it’s people asking for help.
You know you can just unsubscribe to this sub, right? It’s literally made for people with difficulties in their relationships. That says nothing about relationships as a whole
I met my partner over 5 years ago on Tinder. I had just gotten out of a bad marriage, had been dumped by the one guy I had been more serious about trying to date, and was bitter as hell. Never wanted to get married again, refused to move in with him for a year and a half. He’s the best thing that has happened to me.
He constantly does little things just because he knows it will make my day easier, like giving me my medications in the morning before he leaves for work. Buys me little gifts or brings me things that remind him of me. Sometimes it’s an iced coffee, sometimes just a neat rock he found. I’ll catch him looking at me and he will be all teary eyed and I’ll ask him what’s wrong and this goofy ass will tell me that I’m just so pretty and he loves me so much. We honestly rarely ever argue and if we do have disagreements, we take time to calm down and breath and come back to the conversation. He has never ever once called me a mean name or cursed at me. I don’t know how I ended up with someone like him, but I’m eternally grateful I swiped right on him, lol.
Hey look, people are giving you shit but you absolutely have a legit question. I had an abusive marriage. Luckily no cheating involved, but it sucked in every other way.
Then after that I dated a lot. I met so many shitty dudes. Most of them were honestly awful – from the guy who seemed totally sweet and committed but turned out to be a cad, to the weird niceguy tm types that were creepy immediately. Dozens of men who just sucked.
Then I met my husband. He is such a. Perfect match for me. I suggested going to a renaissance festival – he had never been to one, but committed to a weekend away for one and even put together an outfit two months into dating. It was a good sign.
Any disagreements we have, he listens and takes me seriously. If he feels he has done wrong, he acknowledges it and takes steps to correct it, and I do the same.
He helps around the house, probably more than I do, because he works less hours. This man makes the majority of our money, but since he has more free time he has never had a problem doing a bit more as required.
He’s kind, patient, selfless, and he adores me; and I adore him. Even with a little weight gain he finds me so sexy and irresistible.
It took a while, and maybe more importantly it took me immediately cutting things off with guys that weren’t a great fit or had red flags, however tiny. And I’m sure some of was luck. But here we are, it’s possible.
Get off the internet for a bit
My relationship story is nice. But its narratively boring so why post here?
Point being, you should orobably take a social media break and looks at the real world around you
My ex broke it off with me about two months ago. I was extremely distraught about it at first and I told her that I’m sorry if I had pushed her into anything she didn’t want or wasn’t comfortable with.
She told me this in response: “You never did. You were an amazing person. And who ever ends up with you will be the luckiest to have such a caring loving person like you. I’m sorry I couldn’t be that person.”
To hear that coming from her.. it was like a massive weight had been lifted off my shoulders because, in that moment, I knew for certain that I’d done right by her and it solidified why I had fallen in love with her. Those words helped me find a confidence I’d never felt before. I’m still sad that it didn’t work out between us, but she helped push me to become a better person, even if it wasn’t intentional.
Hello! My partner and I have been going out for seven years. We are madly in love to this day. We moved to another state by ourselves and creating a home with our pets and us. It’s been the happiest I have ever been. I do believe because of him I believe in love at all and am living my dream life.
Not sure if this will help but I have had only one experience in a good relationship and I was still In High school at the time. My entire adult life iv had relationships that all turned out bad. I let it dishearten me for a while but I still have hope, so I understand but if I can be beaten and abused and still have hope then so can you. I still believe whole heartedly that there are still good men out there. I have no doubt you will find someone worth your time. The best advice I can give to avoid a crappy relationship is to take your time and not rush into it. Those were the red flags that could’ve helped me avoid a lot of pain.