I was supposed to get coffee with someone off hinge at midday today but they texted me 5 minutes before saying they were hungover so couldn’t make it and would buy me a drink “some other time”.

Am I a shmuck if I try to reschedule? Why do people suck so much lol

40 comments

  1. That’s a pretty bad excuse. I definitely understand that things come up. Ex’s. Kids. Other partners. Work. Being sick. I don’t have a lot of sympathy for “I knew I was going to meet you but cared so little and/or had so little self control that I got so drunk that I couldn’t even get coffee the next day.”

  2. I would just respond something like “hope you feel better, let me know when you are available!”. Then wait for her to do something, if she will.

  5. I just said she can come over to mine some time lol. Not the classiest move but it’s the bare minimum effort as I don’t wanna make plans again but I wouldn’t mind getting laid

  6. Just say goodbye. End of story. No time to waste. Tell them you’re not interested as it shows how unprofessional the person is by the way they handle there meetings.

  7. Well what if she does have a hangover though? My issue is that she waited up until actually meeting to tell you that. She should have been straight up with you in the morning and when she woke up

  8. I wouldn’t reschedule. Waiting until five minutes before hand is inexcusable. And if they did not set up a time and date to reschedule, I wouldn’t go out of my way to do it.

  9. I’d block and move on. Five minutes before is really shitty. She could have given you more time. And she didn’t offer to reschedule.

  11. Nope. If they can’t be bothered now, they won’t next time. Move on and find someone who values your time as much as you do theirs.

  12. People can be lazy and rude but I think when arranging to meet through the internet they don’t even view you as a person.

    Yes they might talk to you and seem real in the conversations but you are just a name on a screen. They have no time to consider your feelings or contemplate the plans you might have made.

    Blocking you, ghosting you, blowing you out and ignoring you is easy because you are disposable and they have so many more fish in the sea.

  13. I would not be interested in pursuing a relationship with someone who cancelled a date at the last minute due to being too hung over. Too many red flags.

  16. Sounds like a lie at best. The “some other time” part means they won’t commit to rescheduling which to me means they didn’t wanna come in the first place. I’d respond with ok and not contact them again.

  18. That person helped you out a lot. They told you in a subtle way that they are an unreliable alcoholic that put drinking ahead of you. If you go out with this person expect this to happen again.

    Weird how many people are assuming this person is female in this thread. I would have guessed it was a guy.

  20. That’s happened to me a few times. Just play it cool and say “no worries! Let me know when you want to get together.” — just leave it in their court. It’s not worth you getting all worked up.

  21. I wouldn’t make any effort to meet up again. If they make the effort, maybe it was a valid excuse.

  22. Doesn’t matter if you try to reschedule, make a date or just try to invite her over, you won’t see her. Just move on.

  23. Yes, you would be a shmuck lol. Have more value in your own self-worth! Those guys aren’t worth your time.

  25. There are baseline rules regarding that.

    Postponing must be made in a reasonable time before, and the person must immediately propose alternate times. Hey, life happens, especially past a certain age. And especially if you date girl with careers etc. In those case, I don’t really care and will be happy to postpone.

    And, emergency may happen ofc.

    In your case ? Hangover ? 5m before ? She is not interested. Move on king

  27. Answer…

    “That’s too bad, but I hope you feel better sooner than later. I will leave it with you if you want to get together. Hope to hear from you.”

    Then just leave it. If it was an honest reason, you’ll hear from them again. If they were blowing you off, you won’t. You will know within 24 hours at most.

  28. They canceld, they can reschedule. But honestly, they are full of it and they are just trying to placate you. Let them go

  29. If she reaches out to set something up, give her a chance. Stuff happens, people make mistakes, so if she puts in effort in the future it can’t hurt to try. Don’t expect anything though, it sounds like this isn’t going to happen.

  30. To me, rain check is only valid if they offer alternative time options like “hey so sorry I can’t make it today but I’m free Friday or Sunday if that works?”

    Like then it’s legit , if no other option it’s done

  31. Don’t bother. She/he knew the date was coming up and yet still decided to get unreasonably smashed which not only shows poor decision making skills in regards to health decisions but also shows a remarkable lack of respect towards you as an individual.

  33. Don’t reschedule. If he was excited to go out with you, he would’ve rallied.

    That’s also such a bad excuse and he let you know last minute. He obviously doesn’t respect your time at all.

  37. Why would you want to date someone to whom getting blitzed is more important than meeting you as scheduled? Would you have even accepted the coffee date if he had put” alcohol problem and unreliable” on his profile?

    Consider yourself warned by what he is showing you about himself. Don’t reschedule! Good luck to you. You deserve better…

  39. Well one time this guy was hungover during the date and i didn’t have a great time as such ~~ so I know things happen but yea I’d prefer the cancellation over a hungover date but that’s just me 😂

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