I (15f) recently started dating this guy (17m) a week ago. I posted about one problem on our relationship in another sub and everyone told me that he was being emotionally abusive. To explain, I have severe depression, adhd, anxiety, and bulimia. He knows this.
He told me that I could be normal with him and that he wouldn’t mind helping me through my struggles. Well, he didn’t help. He made them worse. I mentioned how I was insecure about my weight and he told me “nooo really? I though you were skinny.” I got very upset because it was obviously an insult, telling him that it trigger my ed. He apologized and we moved on. The next morning he started to call me “heavy” and demean me by making fun of my small chest. I once again got upset and he responded with “but I like your body. You’re hot.” I can’t understand why he insults me to my face and then compliments me.
After this today he’s been love-bombing me. He showers me with affection, telling me he loves me, complimenting me, talking about a future of marriage. It makes me uncomfortable because we’ve only known each other for a week. I told him to slow down and he disregarded my feelings and continued.
How do I tell him I want to break up? We have classes together and he knows my full schedule. He’s also friends with my friends. I’m afraid he might get mad at me and hurt me because he’s shown violent tendencies. And is a self admitted “sadist”
6 comments
Ok, tell your friends before he spins a narrative around you. If you feel unsafe do it over text, if you are scared he might try to physically hurt you ask whoever is your closest friend to accompany you to classes and if you are still scared get a teacher involved, also your parents, any support system you have you need to alert them.
If you have messages or anything like that of him and his violent tendencies screenshot them. And proof of him being mean in case your friends ask for it since they are also his friends, not saying you should show them immediately as it would look like you are trying to stir them away from him (if they are good friends to you they will on their own)
Tell your friend and family your plan. Then leave. Block numbers and socials
TALK TO YOUR MOM.
Never tell anyone you “want” to break up with them. Tell him he is not good for you, and you “are” breaking up with him. He sounds very manipulative so be prepared to be forceful and not give in to him and his requests to see you, talk about it etc. “I’ve already decided so I dont see the point in talking about it”
Do not meet him, not to be dramatic but that is how murders of passion happen.
With all you are dealing with you dont need a wnkstain like that in your life.! As mentioned from another post speak to your tutors and your peer’s. Speak to your parents also and if none of that works get the police involved. Theres loads of guys unfortunately that are emotionally abusive and usually it lies within their own inferiority complex. It wont get better. So you just look after you …… The right person will find ya.
You can contact https://www.loveisrespect.org to talk to someone.