We’re coming up on my husband’s first Mother’s Day without his mom. My MIL was a gem – just an absolute light to this world we desperately miss. I’m crying writing this.
We lost her in December, 6 months after her diagnosis of pancreatic cancer. We found out 2 weeks after having our first born. It all happened so fast. We were in the middle of chaos trying to learn the ropes of parenting, our new way of life, selling and buying a house, and grasping the reality of losing our mom. I know my husband is hurting, I know this Mother’s Day is going to be heavy on his heart.
What can I do for him/and his 2 siblings this year? We all planted a tree in her memory as she requested. We’ve thrown our wildflower seeds, as requested. We’ve done a butterfly release, as requested. Is there anything I can do to make this day a little better besides making my husband’s favorite dishes and desserts she made?
2 comments
There’s really nothing more. You’re doing wonderful things already. To me, a little reflection on the wonderful things she did is one way we honor those who’ve left us. Ask, what would she tell you if she could? I’m sure it’d be to live your lives to the fullest.
Because after all, we all have to tread onwards following the inevitable losses we will have in life.
I think following your husband’s lead is good. If he wants to talk about memories with his mom, then do that. If he wants to keep to himself, then allow that. I think making his mom’s recipes is a sweet idea. I always try to make a card for my mother in law and just put it up around the house for Mother’s Day. My husband lost his mom a couple months before our wedding, after 5 weeks in the hospital. It was extremely traumatic, but I’ve learn to let my husband decide whether he wants to talk about her or be on his own.