I get turned off when guys seem super into me and I’m wondering if there’s anything I can do to change that. In some cases I understand why I get put off, because I get this feeling of “he doesn’t even know me yet, but he’s acting like he likes me” so it rings alarm bells that this guy is probably just looking to get into a relationship with anyone.
But in other cases I’ve been speaking to guys, will find them kind of attractive and then all of a sudden it’ll be like they’re giving all their attention to me and it puts me off straight away. I wish it didn’t happen because I feel like I’m being put off by potentially the right people?! I’ve tried just powering through it and telling myself that it’s a stupid reason and to date them anyway, but then the attraction never builds and I end up just dating someone I’m not attracted to.
Maybe this is a job for therapy…
But I feel like this isn’t an uncommon problem for women, or at least I know other women like me. It’s kind of a stereotype that girls only go for guys that don’t like them back. But I’m wondering if anyone has managed to overcome it, and what worked??? I really want to be in a relationship, but not with someone who I’m not attracted to.
3 comments
I imagine it’s overstimulating for many women.
It is common today to date more than one person, or look for dates with different people until exclusivity is confirmed.
Therapy is always a good idea.
Nah .. It’s just that plenty of guys are desperate to the point, where they basically are trying to box in ANY girl as their GF.
So when a guy is into you from the get go then you instinctively classify him as someone that struggles with getting women.
Simple as that.
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On a side note
The advice I offer to guys that complaint here about no woman liking them is:
*Quit everything relationship based in the early stages of dating. Quit feelings and emotional connects. Just be fun and honest*
*You need to realize that most relationships start like this:*
*Fun/chemistry -> sex -> ??? -> more sex -> relationship, feelings and all that jazz*
*Put the last step up front and you’ll get a “You’re a great guy, but …” rejection*
Erm.. i hate it when guys move too quick as well. idk, to me it feels like ‘so i’m that easy? are they thinking that i’m too easy?’. i remember feeling so upset when a guy tryna kissed me on our third date, without my consent. i stopped all interaction right away.
i think it’s a matter of personality. i think you’re just like me, simply want respect and want people who’re interested with you to be serious with you. usually that means taking things slow. i don’t think it’s a flaw, and therefore, needs to be fix.
i think you just have to continue being you. but keep your heart open. the perfect guy will come.