I’ve been with my gf for a few years now. I’m nearly 30, she’s in her mid 20s. She was a virgin when I met her, and she is the best person I’ve ever met. We didn’t have sex for like a year and a half, because she was very conservative and shy, and I was willing to do that because I couldn’t imagine ever having a better fit for me personality wise.
Unfortunately, the sex turned out to be just plain bad. We’ve tried for a long time, and succeeded at times, but overall it seems to get harder and harder to make it work as time goes on. She kind of sees sex like a kid would. I know that sounds weird, but it’s like everything she does regarding sex is somehow “cute” and a bit immature and timid, and it’s completely killed my ability to desire sex with her. Now I struggle to even keep an erection with her. It feels kind of sad in a way, because I really miss being able to enjoy sex, and my attempts to explain or communicate about this issue have failed over and over again.
I don’t want the best relationship I’ve ever had, and probably ever will have, to be ruined by bad sex.
Do you have any ideas how to handle situations like this?
Comments very appreciated, this is a really horrible situation for me and I need some kind of help here
5 comments
If it’s that important, spend the money and seek a professional for help.
I guess I was lucky that my 27 year old virgin gf wanted to explore and try out almost anything. It was fun experiencing “virginity” a second time. But therapy could be good for you.
Listen to us, therapy is a solid move!
As most have been suggesting, therapy should help. However, since your girlfriend has a different narrative in her head about sex than you, you two obviously don’t match sexually, which sucks. If you’ve already had convos with her and they aren’t working out, you’ve already built resentment toward her and that’s not a good sign. Over time, it’s only going to create a bigger divide. Invest in therapy or it might be time to break up. I’m sorry. Good luck.
Bend her over and just fuck her doggie then? Or really whatever position you do do, just take command of the situation