I’m feeling attracted to a guy friend and it’s confusing me.

For further context I refer you to my previous posts.

As I was saying I’ve been confused already because recently I’ve found myself watching gay porn, even though otherwise I felt straight.

Well now I’m really confused and looking for some ideas about what this means.
Even now I don’t know about if identifying as bi would be accurate, but I don’t feel completely normal either right now.

I play football twice a week with a group of friends and in the last couple of weeks a new guy has joined the group.

He’s quite a big, tall guy, attractive etc.
I find myself really attracted to him and I hate feeling like this.

I feel quite nervous around him, which is weird enough but not as disturbing as how I reacted on Tuesday.

It was after in the changing room and he took his shirt off and for a moment I thought about him wrapping his arms around me and I ‘wet’ myself slightly.
I obviously feel ashamed of myself. Luckily none of the guys can tell I’m in awe of him but it’s screwing with my head.

I feel like it’s gone beyond just appreciating a guy who keeps in shape and has ventured into sexual feelings.
I must add there could be several reasons for this and maybe I’m not really attracted to him.
It could still be a weird phase.

I had a wet dream last night (which I haven’t in a long time) dreaming about him. I’m questioning myself more than ever.
Outside of porn imagining it, I’ve never dreamed about having sex with another man before.

I feel really alone and I hate myself rn. There must be other guys who have similar feelings.
I’d like to chat with someone just to feel less alone tbh.

What should I think or do about this? Wtf am I?