I feel like I’m finally getting the hang of dating. Attracting serious, quality men on my profile and weeding out the rest. I’m having fun, feeling relaxed, attractive and sexy. I do need to vent though because my friends are married and don’t care haha. I recently met a man who was 4 years younger (28) who he made me laugh out loud frequently and stimulated my brain like no other. We have kind of relatable personal history and just super compatible personalities and communication. I was completely smitten and so was he. But I started to notice he wasn’t emotionally present. He deleted Hinge which was weird as it was a recent connection and a day later he asked to talk on the phone and said he needed to press pause and work on some things. We discussed how he seemed “stuck” and he really admired me and I the same for him. I told him I respected that he honored he couldn’t give me what I deserve and am looking for, and said to reach out if anything changes. He gave me the sweetest blessing and it was such a thoughtful parting.
Now me, being who I am, rocking at dating and valuing my needs – I had noticed Man A was emotionally unavailable and not meeting me at the heart level. So by the time we’d had that conversation I had already went out with Man B. Meeting Man B was like the universe saying “I hear you girl, I got you”. He’s incredibly emotionally aware, intelligent and considerate. And we had an awesome, spontaneous date which I’d planned to be for a couple of hours and before I knew it 4 hours had gone by. We’re compatible emotionally, intellectually, financially and we both nerd out heavily on the same topic. We’re taking it slow but damn I can really see myself with this person!
My heart is bummed about Man A because I hadn’t connected with someone like that in YEARS…Yet suddenly here is Man B, the balm to ease that soreness and give me hope.
7 comments
Sometimes it is just a matter of making room for what you want by removing what doesn’t serve your needs. Good luck!
Real connections are becoming rarer and rarer these days. I feel you on that about A, that’s a hard thing to shake.
Take your time with B and make sure you’re not trying to find someone else to just mend the void. Judgement could be clouded.
Good luck!
This is great !!!! Go you 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
That’s so awesome I love your experience! Keep going and enjoy your time
This is inspiring to read!!! Could you share any examples of things you’ve changed (about your profile, your approach, your screening or dating process) that you feel is working?
Of all the “problems” to have this is a great one. I feel you one the man A scenario, as something not too dissimilar recently happened to me, but it’s fantastic you found a man B so quickly. Best of luck!
I’d consider avoiding terms like ‘quality men’ because it honestly sounds very elitist and judgmental.
As much as I have a preference on the types of women I prefer to date, I wouldn’t label the other women as ‘low quality’ especially because on most metrics, either end of the spectrum would be a problem (in which case you’re saying super high quality is bad too).