What would you do if you suddenly had omnipotence?

31 comments

1. My brain would explode

2. Fly home to see my parents and tell them the good news. Then probably do some good stuff, realise it wasnt so good, then hide for a bit. maybe figure out how i could run on a tread mill for a while to power europe so my heating bills aren’t so large. or get a job flying things around. who knows?!?!

3. Exchange everyone’s mouth with their butthole

4. Edit a PDF.

5. I don’t know what omnipotence means and I’m not looking it up.

   I choose masturbate furiously

6. Make stupidity painful.

   Like before the fact. Some guy walking along, goes to hit on the biker chick next to her old man, and suddenly falls to the ground screaming and holding his head.

   “Dude, what happened?”
   ” I dunno. Must have tried to do something stupid.”

   And some folks would be in constant pain. I am ok with that.

7. Probably absorb most of the heat and replenish the ozone layer. Also might play around and blow up every nuke just to absorb their energy/radiation

8. People are talking about doing things for the good of humanity but honestly I would make all my loved ones immortal angels and make my own edan for us to live in, then make humanity from the ground up. This universe is fucked, later weirdos.

   Just to clarify, earth now would stay, I would just make my own universe somewhere else.

9. Maybe finally figure out what women want

10. I would know then.

11. I mean…. Literally everything.

12. 2 chicks at the same time

13. Use it to get laid?

14. Take viagra.

15. Use it to give myself omniscience

16. Probably kill myself. Hey, if Little Joey’s dead, then I got no reason to live!

17. Have a lot of fun. Give physicists the GUT.

    I’d make magic actually possible. But not without cost. Basically the complexity of any magic makes the cost higher. And the cost is pain and energy.

18. I would travel to distant worlds and try to find intelligent alien life before comitting time and energy trying to fix earth.

19. Assuming I can move through time unhindered and not be harmed or destroyed, I’d likely roam the world seeing all I possibly can without any rush. I’d work on cures. I’d travel the stars to see if there’s life out there similar to ours and also vet them (or compare our civilizations) to see if interactions between our planets would be constructive and beneficial.

    I’d pretty much satisfy my hunger for knowledge….hm…I wonder, if one can be omnipotent, can they make themselves omniscient? Seems like the two go hand in hand.

20. Thanos snap. But I’m not being random. I would also adjust my age to a more favorable point, and lock it there. I would remove salt from a portion of the ocean, and distribute it across Africa. I would annihilate the Chinese ruling class and give their people a chance to attempt to build a more favorable government. I would disable all nuclear warheads globally at the same time, and I would demand that the isotopes be repurposed for power production. I would purify the atmosphere, clean the trash out of the ocean, dig up the landfills and singlehandedly recycle every usable material out of the mountain of trash I would end up with before mulching the rest and distributing it across areas that are available for forests to regrow, but struggle to do so. And lastly, I would install myself not as a ruler, but as an overseer. I don’t want to be your president, your king, or your dictator. But when some uppity moron gets out of line, I’ll make it quick and convenient for people to vote to have them deposed.

21. Uhh…. Monica is that you?

22. Lotta people ‘bout to spontaneously combust

23. Raise all of humanities iq by 50 points

24. Obviously create an equally omnipotent enemy to keep the boredom at bay

25. Use it to gain omniscience.

26. I’d be a god. Hang out overseeing everything, making small, but long-lasting decisions that would give opportunity to humanity to go foward. I’d also give signs of my existence so people would look for, research and try to find out who or what I was.

27. Abolish black licorice.

    After that, I’d put an end to cancer and other diseases.

28. **Judgement Day**

    There will be a massive, massive amount of smiting.

    Global population will likely drop heavily.

    # I am a vengeful god.

    Many who invoked my name will suffer more than any human has suffered before they die. Televangelists, abusive catholic priests, leaders of nations, politicians…

29. Make it so that politicians and clerics can not tell a lie.

30. I would personally hunt down ignoring bullets and whatever *every single corrupt politician in the fucking world*.

    The snail problem, but with a human.

    Doesn’t matter where you hide, I’m all powerful. *And I’m gonna get ya.*

31. I would not be a gentle ruler of mankind