I always keep my lower area shaved but have been interested in growing it out lately. My boyfriend and I have been together 5 years and I asked him what he thought about me not shaving anymore, to which he replied “I don’t think I’d care, you should do whatever you want” and made a joke about “as long as it isn’t permanent”. I made clear it was just out of curiosity to do it once but that I wanted to see how long it could get.
Fast forward 3-4 weeks and we hadn’t been having a lot of sex and I hadn’t been shaving. I’m insecure already and didn’t love how it looked, but still wanted to see what it was like. We lay down to have sex and he moves his hand lower, immediately retracting it and saying something along the lines of “holy shit! It’s a jungle down there! I didn’t even know what I was touching!!”. I laugh it off and kind of agree that it is a lot. I’m not too bothered by it because I get that it caught him off guard, but then he says that he doesn’t wanna touch me anymore and” I’m not even gonna describe how that just made me feel” with a disgusted tone. I explained that i had told him I wanted to full on grow it out and had asked him what he thought, and he said he didn’t care. Then he says that he didn’t think it’d be that long (compared to a full out bush, it wasn’t). I was slightly annoyed and offended by his continuation of comments.. I was pretty turned off because I felt like he was grossed out by me and didn’t feel attractive enough to want to have sex.
Fast forward and I shaved shortly after because I felt so unattractive but we still haven’t had sex.. In about a month. Even though I’m shaved it feels really shitty that he made me feel so bad about it. He’s had hairstyles or beard styles I really did not like but I never said anything like that to him, because I knew he liked how it looked and wanted it that way. Am I overreacting or was his reaction kinda crappy? Just looking for a reality check lol. (I’m not not having sex with him because of this specifically, other stuff has been going on and I do feel insecure in general, especially after this).
TLDR: I told my bf I was growing out my pubes, he said he didn’t care and then acted disgusted when I actually did it.
3 comments
He’s acting like a child. What’s his pube situation? Is he clean shaven?
Yeah, his reaction was way over the top. Even if he didn’t like it, he could say that without being such a dick about it.
What he said was extremely shitty. You’re not overreacting at all, he was the one who overreacted. The jungle comment might have been a little insensitive but I could see being meant innocently/jokingly, but the other comments were terrible. He owes you an apology.