A friend invited me to travel to her country and hotels are quite expensive. Would you be comfortable with asking to stay over at her apartment for a week? or is it better to stay separately in a hotel. She has to really trust you to hang out in her place alone if she has to go to work.

31 comments

  7. If she invited you to come to her country to visit her, i would assume she would be willing to open her home if she has the space. I would also wager that if she invited you to visit unprovoked, she may like you. Sounds like she took a subtler approach than flying you out.

  9. It depends on the dynamic she and I have. Typically I’m enjoying her company more often than I have thoughts of getting with her sexually or whatever. I’d just clear it with her neighbors if she was going to leave me home alone at her place.

  11. I guess this really depends on the country you’re travelling to? I’ve done this in Germany (in fact halfway through my stay she had to leave town for a wedding and she let me stay in her appartment while she was gone) and I would imagine it being doable in other “openminded” countries? But in more traditional places it probably wouldn’t be possible

  13. I recently went on a “vacation” to a female friends place. Me and her have been friends for 10 years tho so yes that goes with your sentiment on trust

  16. Depends on how close of friends you are and what her living situation is (if she lives with others it could be uncomfortable for them or she may not have space to accommodate another person). Since she asked you to come it seems like it would be reasonable to ask to crash at her place.

  17. “Hey! Trying to plan out my stay and wanted to get your thoughts on me crashing at your place. Let me know either way ☺️”

    Why ask Reddit when you should just ask her?

  18. I’ve done it a few times. It’s gone all three ways. Just fine and no big deal, awkward as hell and left next morning, hit it off and got laid for a week.

    It completely depends on you and the girl and the relationship you have.

  20. I probably would t even ask to stay at a male friends apartment for a whole week. But you could just mention that you will be in town and ask if she can recommend a place to stay. Maybe she’ll invite you.

  21. I love doing that. Bring a bottle of wine and some basic groceries, make her dinner, talk into the night, and go to sleep wherever she wants you to. Clean up after yourself and leave before you’ve overstayed your welcome. Done it plenty of times, it’s always sweet.

  25. Both my closest female friends know that the only thing nefarious I’d ever do in that situation would be to prank them by doing something like hiding my phone in an undisclosed location in the house and playing edgy early 2000s music from it as they struggle to find it and turn it off.
    They know I won’t try anything wrong and I know our relationship would stay as it is. So yeah, very comfortable.

  26. It’s totally normal. I’d crash on the couch or a guest room, of course, but I see no issue crashing at a female friend’s house. I’ve done it.

    What exactly does she have to worry about me doing while she’s at work?

  28. I’d try to plan that part *before* I committed to making the journey in the first place. The idea of getting into a strange new location and only *then* figuring out where to sleep strikes me as kind of irresponsible.

  29. >A friend invited me to travel to her country

    Generally when someone invites you to travel to spend time with them, they’re inviting you to stay with them as their guest, too.

  31. I have long distance friendships and i went all the way to my female friend and the first time i booked a hotel and than she was convinced it was okey to sleep at her house next time i come over because yk she just didn’t want me there for the first time what I totally understand ofc because I could’ve been like an mad person who would harass her yk what i mean, not that i ever would do that btw i would never harass anyone im not a bad person

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