Hi,
I’ve been friends with these two people for about 9 years. Lately I’ve noticed that they don’t reply to my messages that feature a problem/ sorrow or an accomplishment anymore. They just ignore it and start a different topic.
I’ve asked them once before and they just said they don’t know what to answer to things that make me sad. But that they can’t even say a “good job”, “happy for you” or a simple “yay” to me finally doing something right at my job hurts and makes me want to not share anything with them anymore.
Am I doing something wrong? I’ve stopped sharing most of my problems but always reply to their problems. Should I stop sharing accomplishments too?
4 comments
They cleared it that they don’t know what to answer then why do you bother. Not everyone’s gonna be enough experienced to response to situations. Or, maybe they actually don’t like responding to these things. Yes, you can feel sad. Anyone would feel sad if their friends don’t understand their problems. I’d suggest getting new friends who are capable of understanding, listening, reacting to your situations properly. And don’t let these things let you down. Be strong. Just accept the way they are and move on.
One of the major features of friendship is they share your joys and sorrows with you. So I guess you have a lot of history, but I’m not sure what these friends bring to your life that’s valuable. I guess if you hang onto them as friends I’d put them in the category of “not as close,” if they can’t even respond to your stuff in a friend-like way.
These sound like acquaintences, someone mentioned how friends share joys and sorrows, which is true. Acquaintences only share joys, if there is sorrow to each their own.
Could it be time to reconnect more outside the group chat, in person?