Im a 24 year old man and I still do not know how to talk to people. When i think of things to say or explain things my mouth would say something differently its like my brain cant process it to my mouth to say it. I do have a tendency of stuttering just a bit. Is there any tips out there that can help me speak more confidently and able to speak more clear that the person who im speaking to can understand what im trying to explain,etc.
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Firstly I would recommend seeing a doctor and seeing if there’s any diagnosis of any mental problems if you’ve not already, good to know if you find out your on the spectrum.
Regardless of the diagnosis you can still work on yourself, just I’m better equipped to give advice on nurotypical people rather than nurodivergant (non-autistic verses autistic if you’re unaware)
Now with that out of the way the best advice I can give is to just get out there and practice, you don’t have to jump up on stage and give speeches but small challenging steps are the foundation of not only self confidence but self development too.
Try reading aloud to yourself, this may feel weird but the idea is to get yourself used to not only talking aloud but also alining your brain and your mouth, I used to be super awkward and quiet it wasn’t until my last years of school that I began to break out of that but also then working at a bar afterwords that I managed to break out of that and gain the skills I needed to socialize.
Nowadays I not only don’t shut up but I can talk to anyone on a dime, I still fumble words and say something that I mean differently. When that happens there’s nothing wrong with being upfront and saying, “that’s not what I meant by that let me rephrase” people might look at you funny but it’s better than letting what you said go misunderstood.
To go along with reading aloud, practice writing and learning alot of the ins and outs of the English language if you don’t already, most of us already know how to read and write but understanding fundamental building blocks to meaning, tone, expression can go leaps and bounds in better communication skills.
Another method is to just push yourself and talk to people, doesn’t need to be randoms on the street or anything. Could be a local bar or coffee shop, strike up a simple conversation with the clerk or perhaps someone nearby you have in common, this conversation doesn’t have to last longer then one question or a small amount of back and fourth but it’s the repetition that is important.
Communication is a skill, one that so many sadly aren’t trained in, if you need a push get a job in retail or somewhere you need to be social to a degree it’s a difficult road but putting yourself in that position or having something force you in that position can do wonders.
Regardless remember that there’s nothing wrong with you, you can develop this skill and learn to have better communication skills it’s a difficult road to walk but you are not alone. Keep at it and remember that any win be it small or large is still a win, I believe in ya buddy, I hope you believe in you too.