Why does it seem to be a common experience for straight guys to be aggressively hit on by gay guys?

22 comments

1. Because they’re also men. That’s just what some dudes do. They are shitty.

2. Because that’s how a large part of all men behaves.

   Most men are straight, so most of the aggressive behaviour is directed at women. But some men are gay, so some of the aggressive behaviour is directed at men, too.

   Don’t see it as an issue of gay men and straight men; it’s an issue of men of all sexualities. (And some women, though far less.)

3. Gay men are still men. So they act the same way towards other men as straight guys do towards women.

   I had several experiences with aggressive gay men in my 20s and it completely altered the way I in turn interact with women

4. Seriously, joined bumble for the bff part to meet guy friends and started talking to one guy who had similar interests then all of a sudden he asked me if I was bi, I said no I like women and I’m married. He responded with that’s because you haven’t gotten a bj from me, and proceeded to try and get me to try it like what part of I’m not into men don’t you understand

5. First they get a fuck off, then they catch a beating.

6. Imma guess a small percent ruin it for everyone.

   I’ve been hit on by gay men before, but never aggressively. “I’n not gay” has always resolved the situation.

7. I am the straightest man ever. I have never, in my life, ever been hit on by a gay man.

8. Well, now I feel scary ugly. This never happens to me. Come on guys, if you’re cute, you might have a chance!

9. either they dont know and are being wishful or those flirting are predatory.

   there are three men at present that i know for a fact that are wishing that i was at the very least bi as they have made the comments and continue to make advances.

10. It’s the individual
    In college one of my friends came out and had most of his family/friends leave him, so I made sure to hang out with him. This meant gay parties and bars on occasion. The guys that hit on me were always respectful but made it known that they were interested. Not until recently, did I deal with an aggressive dude that’s about 15 years older than me. We worked together for a while and I’d get texts about if I wanted to see his stuff, he went through my phone when I left it at my desk, always asked me out, etc.

    I really just think it depends on the person and if they’re decent or not.

11. Ehhh. I’ve been eye fucked by gay dudes which is odd but none have ever actually tried to hit on me. Maybe the people saying that come off as kind of feminine so the gay guys think they’re gay?

12. I was chased around a house party in Germany by a big gay bear type guy. That was about it. I’ve had other gay/bi men experss interest, but never so aggressively.

    Honestly, I don’t really care. I’m not actually that threatened by it. I just wish more women would “express interest” in me that directly more often. That’s really all I’m thinking: “why couldn’t it be a woman.”

13. Call me crazy but I suspect the gay man found the straight one attractive.

14. I’m straight and never had a guy hit on me at all. I have noticed on a few occasions that some guys gave me a look that showed interest and from the body language and style, i could tell they were gay but that’s about it.

    I could handle it well if a guy kindly hit on me and I’d just kindly reject him, but if it was a aggressive type situation, then I’m beating him to a pulp.

15. So I have actually been very aggressively hit on by gay men where i feared for my safety and I’ve also been sexually assaulted by two in my life (thank God my friends saved me both times before anything happened). But I mean there are always assholes out there, I probably had it happen more frequently because I was around gay men more often since I had a lot ot gay friends growing up. I don’t see those instances as a representation of the whole group. I’ve also known a lot of gay men that were just regular dudes and were cool.

16. Gay or straight there is a small percentage of shitty guys who can’t take No for an answer. But they are hyper aggressive and hit on a ton of people.

17. Having spent some time in gay bars (and am straight), it’s not ‘bad’, just very forward. I think that can be viewed as ‘aggressive’, as most women would NEVER hit on a man the way men hit on women.

18. Gay dudes are still dudes, and can have all the toxic qualities that straight dudes can have.

    Being a complete asshole is one of those things that people can be regardless of race, color, creed, sex, gender, etc.

19. Eh, easy answer here is that some people just suck.

    I’ve had a few gay men flirt with me, but never in a way i would describe as aggressive.

    In my limited experience “no thanks” was all that was needed.

    But those are individual experiences

20. It’s most likely an internet thing.

    Not saying it doesn’t happen but it appears to be more prevalent because the same people bring it up on the internet.

21. Never been hit on by a gay guy aggressively. Was hit on by a sweetheart though. He was such a nice, genuine guy that I felt bad telling him I’m married.

22. Gays do not reproduce, they recruit. 48% of homosexuals has been sexually abused and groomed by another gay man during their youth.