This girl at work, we used to work in the same department but she’s at a different one, and so I only see her briefly somedays. Every now and then we’d pass each other but that’s it.
So I feel interested and attracted to her, but I know nothing about her, don’t know if she’s single, boyfriend, girlfriend, married, kids, I have no clue.
I’ve been attracted for a few months but I do have the desire to try to talk to her, but I have no clue what to even say. I’m socially awkward, I’m not smooth or anything like that and I’m not really the person to do a cold approach usually.
Usually I keep to myself even if I’m interested in someone, this time feel like I have to make an attempt, I only got this feeling one other time in my life.
I’m willing to potentially get humiliated if that’s what it leads to, hopefully not though. I don’t know what kind of person she is, so I’m not sure if she’s nice or chill or what but dammit I’m determined to make an attempt at the least.
If she doesn’t seem interested I know to just wish her a nice day and keep it moving, I want to be able to put this behind me, so I really want to try like I said.
I just don’t know what to say, but I want to do this. So if I said hi and if she says hi back and doesn’t look bothered or anything, what do say afterwards? Thanks.
5 comments
Just like you approach anyone else. Stop thinking about it so much
Instead of basing everything on how she says hi, why not ask her for coffee? Her response to hi could be read incorrectly for dozens of reasons.
There is no perfect approach. You just gotta do it man it’s gonna be hard
Ask her how her day is going and if she likes the same type of tv shows, books, or movies that you like. If you have a pet that’s a great topic.
“Hey, I’ve been seeing you around work for so long and you seemed really interesting, so I wanted to introduce myself and say hi. I’m {name}.”
Come up with some questions to follow up with. Some generic “So how long have you worked for xyz/so you work for x department, right?” but more lightly personal, but not overly personal–ie asking her what neighborhood she lives in is borderline.
Doesn’t have to be a big long conversation (though great if it works out that way), you have introduced yourself and you can chat more in the future–as long as you don’t forget her name!
I would suggest leaving the asking out to future you. But if you insist on asking in the first conversation, there’s always, “By any chance, would you be up for going out for coffee one of these days?”