People in relationships, when did you realize your s/o was in love with you?

17 comments

1. She told me as soon as she realized her own feelings. Communication is absolutely key. Be honest, express your feelings (or express when you need time to process things). But being able to talk to someone is big.

2. He started throwing the word “love” around
   “I love going out with you” “I did xxxx for you with love”
   I wanted him to say the full sentence first, so I looked into his eyes and said “I’m so happy with you”, he said “you probably already know, but I love you” and I said I loved him too 😍❤️

3. My husband is my first relationship. Not the same for him, he dated around, but I’d never had a boyfriend before him. We were only a few weeks in, and I hadn’t really thought about it, but one day when I got home, I called to let him know I had gotten home safely, and he told me he loved me. I had never been in love before, but it only took a minute to realize I loved him too.

   Keep the faith. There are good people out there, and love exists.

4. When I asked if he was interested in visiting the idea of a relationship (we had had a conversation a couple years prior and the timing simply wasn’t right) and he told me he’d been waiting for me to open the door so that he could get to love me, and that he would have waited forever but he’s glad I didn’t make him wait that long.

5. Several months into our relationship I was in an a car accident, SUV ran a red light. Her reaction when I told her is what really solidified that she loved me.

6. 20 years ago in 9th grade. I ran. 😂🏃🏾‍♂️… But here we are, back at it. Its been 9 months and I can’t complain. She’s wonderful.

7. I am leaving this here as a reminder. So I may possibly gain faith again.

   Because my blood boils like heated oil and heart crushes itself with each disgustingly wet roar that echoes in my ears and leaves me trembling in indignation.

   It’s not a good state to be in, I’d say.

8. I’ve been with my partner for….fuck, like 7/8 years all up? Not a long time, but we’ve known each other since we were 16, we’re 25 now. Dated for a year just after high school, broke up, got back together and yeah.

   I’ll be honest, it wasn’t until recently I started ‘knowing’ he was in love with me.

   For whatever reason – low self esteem, poor mental health, pick a flavour of that – I struggled to understand just what he saw in me. I knew on a logical level he loved me. He told me all the time. He showed me in small ways but I just couldn’t comprehend it somehow.

   See for me, loving him was like breathing. Like someone took off my sunglasses and the world was brightly coloured again. I’d loved him for pretty much the whole time I’d known him but he’d kept me a bit more at arms length due to his own issues. My love for him wasn’t even a question it was a statement of fact but for me his love always felt in question somehow.

   Anyway.

   Like I said, realising I loved him was an ‘all at once’ moment. Realising he loved me came slowly, over a long time.

   There was the day my sister almost died, how he came straight to my house and lay in my bed, before we’d officially gotten back together. He held my hand while he slept.

   There was the time we went to a museum. I love museums and he doesn’t care as much. I was taking videos of everything and when I looked back later to decide what to post I realised he was mostly looking at me.

   There was the time I found a bee trapped in a curtain. I’m terribly scared of them and so is he, but he rescued it and took it outside just to make me happy.

   Maybe the time I was describing in detail the fictional history of a fantasy world, diving deep into tinfoil theory shit, and he listened. He watched the series with me afterwards and when he saw me getting excited he’d pause the show so I could excitedly explain some UNNECESSARY context.

   He used to walk to work and each day on his way home he’d pick me a flower. Just a random fucking flower, half crushed in his pockets. But I love flowers.

   He bought me a bulbasaur toy. Not for any real reason, just because I’d mentioned that as a kid bulbasaur was no one’s favourite so I decided he was mine. He laughed because that’s very like me, to love something just because it needs it.

   But the most perfect, beautiful, smallest moment….
   Two weeks ago, I moved to sleep at the end of the bed closest to the heater because I was cold. I was lying across the bed horizontally. We have a king bed and I’m fairly short but he’s tall so I’d managed to scooch up there without nudging him but he still woke anyway. When I told
   Him I was cold, he moved to lie lengthways across the bed to hold me, to warm me up.
   This man hates being woken up. But he moved without a thought, just because I was a little cold.

   I used to think that love was grand gestures, and fireworks, and candlelit dinners and grand declarations. I’ve had that kind of love from him too but I guess I never really believed it as much.
   But the years of small efforts, tiny things this man has done to show me just how present I am in his thoughts, all the time. The ways he tries to make me smile….as Iay there, his chest against my back, I felt silly for ever even questioning the depth of love he has for me. Of course he loves me. Like breathing. Easy, simply, without a second thought.

   I think he’ll be proposing soon. I used to think that the day he proposed I’d finally be sure, that I’d know beyond a shadow of a doubt that the years we’d had meant as much to him as me.
   Now, when I think of me ugly sobbing, drowning out the speech he no doubt put hours of work into, I know my joy won’t be because I’ll feel like it’s a confirmation of our past, but a celebration of the future. I’m so excited to grow old with this idiot. I’m so lucky to know him and love him as deeply as I do.

9. When I realized that after a bad day I just wanted to come home to her instead of galavanting around the town to boost my ego.

10. I just knew it. When someone loves you, you can feel it-at least, this has been my experience. I have never more sure about something that the fact that my partner loves me. We have been together for four years and I still just know it. However, that does not mean that the relationship is perfect. It does takes effort and love is not the only important thing in a relationship.

11. This is going to sound not great but it’s actually really sweet.
    When we were dating I could tell he was a very egocentric and selfish. Things he did for me in the beginning felt rehearsed, like he it was a routine comparable to brushing your teeth or taking out the trash to maintain hygiene/stability. So soon down the line we broke up. During that break up I realized I was in love with him. I have no idea why.

    So I drove to his house and yelled at him. “What do we gotta do to fix this? Cuz I’m tired of this shit” (I’m paraphrasing). He smiled and said no one’s ever done this before. We had a conversation and decided to give it a shot. He still showed his selfish side, but he was getting better. Remembering my favorite pizza. Calling me to see if I wanted anything from the store. (Food is love to me, what can I say? Lol)

    Then we had another hiccup. An ex called crying saying she made a mistake. I could tell he was shook, she had a hold on him. I felt it. I gave him 2 days to figure himself out. I came back and he still wasn’t sure. I made arrangements to leave. I felt his body shake at the mention of me leaving and said he’d never talk to her again. He’s been true to his word to this day.

    Now we are 5 years in. Married. And a kid on the way. He knows I like to rotate between hot cheetos and hot fries. Knows that back scratches calm me down when I’m anxious. Always asks if I need anything.

    I guess I knew he loved me when he became uncomfortable if I was and did what he could to fix it

    It’s not the movie love many like to see. But my husband is fiercely protective of me and genuinely hates seeing me in pain

12. It’s the things he does for me. Doing things because he knows it makes me happy. Showing that he pays attention. It wasn’t one moment but an accumulation of small actions.

13. When I realized he would stop whatever he was doing in order to be there for me when I needed him. We were friends first before we ever tried a romantic relationship. I noticed he would always pick up breakfast for me every day for three years before our first date to make sure I ate and no matter what restaurant we went to for lunch he would know what I’d want to order because he paid attention to my tastes. When I had my first child, he’d bring me some of my favorite sushi for lunch just so he could he can visit with me and make sure I wasn’t feeling too isolated with a newborn.

14. We were friends for years and I thought he was cute, but I was in a bad, physically abusive relationship. He was always there for me. After the breakup with my ex we had sex, I thought the sex was pretty bad as he didn’t seem into it. Thought we would just remain friends. But, afterwards he was so in love wanting to be over everyday and just telling me how much he loves me. We were together ever since.

15. When I made her mad about not treating her how she wanted to be treated and she threw stuffed animals around rooms and lost her mind. I knew simultaneously that I had fucked up minorly but also that she loved me. I vowed to fix it no matter what. It was bumpy road at first but the animal chucker is laying on the couch behind me now 13 years late.r

16. when i first got into a relationship with my current boyfriend, after a few days in i had already the urge to tell him “i love you” but i felt like It wasnt the right time. he was the one who said it first, and when i heard it i immediately melted. i thought about it for a week straight if not more. we’ve e been together for two months but I’ve always had the biggest crush on him for about a year. i still get butterflies when i think about it and melt when he says he loves me

17. Quite early on in the relationship, and I fell for him early too.

    He did not verbalize it immediately though because he did not want me to feel pressured and he wanted to be very careful that he was genuinely in love and not just infuriated before he said anything about it. I appreciate his caution and willingness to restrain himself so that we could build a good foundation.