The title says it all. It’s been 4+ weeks now. I confessed my feelings to him and was left on read. We were romantically involved first, then he disappeared. Came back after a while saying he just wants to be friends with benefits. I don’t do fwb and could not do with someone I’m in love with. I confessed my feelings to him and did not hear back. My friends say no answer is also an answer. But I’m having a really hard time moving on. The first 3 weeks were hell. I cried everyday. Now it’s less. I see him in my dreams, weekends are just spent alone and feeling really low.
I would like to know how can one consciously try to move on? I joined art classes recently so that distracts a bit. But as soon as I am home from work or class or friends I miss him so so much. And keep hoping he’ll text.. I am trying really hard to move on. Even thinking of changing cities. Maybe that will help not sure.
4 comments
It is okay to feel like that, it is okay to miss someone and it is okay to cry your heart out. Just let it all out don’t hold back anything. Keep working on yourself and keep doing whatever you feel is right and distracting enough. These low feelings will come for some time but after a while you’ll learn to live with them. It is hard moving on and even difficult to forget someone who you love so dearly. Give yourself time, go to trips with your friends, talk to them confide in them, you’ll feel much better.
No advice except just wanted you to know you’re not alone. Everyone says time is the answer.
I can’t even meet my dates without scaring them away :/. I guess just same advice I’ve been told: find someone else. Preferably someone who’d like to settle down.
I’m going through something similar. We’ve dated 2 months, even went to Paris together. He told me a couple of days ago he doesn’t feel anything romantic for me. Worst heartbreak i’ve felt so far, though i know people have been through worse.
This is maybe the 3rd time i’ve been in love and the other person just doesn’t see anything serious in me. My self esteem has never suffered worse tbh. I just want you to know you’re not alone and most times the issue is with the other person and not you. Here are some thoughts that have helped me through it
– The only person who can give you closure is yourself. No matter their reason, it’s simply not worth chasing someone who doesn’t want to stay
– Love is worth fighting for but not if you’re the only one worth fighting
Some advice would be
– Zoom out: look at all the other things in your life that are going well and focus on those
– Good on you for keeping busy! Stay on it and one day you’ll just wake up and it’s been so long already
– Make a list of their red flags. Or just things that annoy you. Look back on this when you miss them, helps to snap you out of the rose colored glasses
– Keep your distance and try as much as you can to remove reminders of them. I know some people can be friends with their ex straight after, but this personally works best for me
– Try not to entertain the thought that they’ll ever come back. It’s better to treat it as if they won’t, but if they do then it’ll just be a pleasant surprise
I know it’s tough to have a soft heart in such a ruthless world. Sending you so many hugs! Don’t ever think you need to change that because the world needs more people who love unconditionally. It sucks, but for someone who’s had a bit more experience, it does get better xx